Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 85322 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 427(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85322 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 427(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Yeah, of course. Golf was so fucking boring, but he was the hottest golfer on earth. I’d watched him on that driving range thing a few times.
My stomach tightened as he rounded the car. He wasn’t going for his golf bag first. That was usually his MO. Had to get the clubs into their storage in the garage. Not now. Hopefully, he had a more pressing matter to tend to.
I bit at the corner of my mouth. “So, um…should I run out for ice cream and tissues, or should I drop my pants?”
He shook his head in amusement and walked toward me. The only thing that troubled me was his pace. He didn’t radiate urgency or nothing. There wasn’t enough purpose in his steps, all while…it wasn’t like he walked slowly either.
Maybe I was overanalyzing.
Maybe I was nervous as fuck.
My nerves were shot, my breathing was a little too shallow, my heart was slamming in my chest, and I swore I could hear my own pulse. Fuck me, what if he couldn’t reconcile—
He came closer and closer. “In the end, I had to ask myself if I was sufficiently fucked in the head.”
Um, okay?
Without another word, he grabbed my hand and tugged me to him—just a simple pull, before I went way too willingly into his arms. Tiny explosions set off within me as the warmth from his body enveloped my own, and he squeezed me so tightly that my eyes welled up from sheer hope. Desperate, desperate hope.
Did this mean—
“I’m a shell of a man without you, Alfie,” he murmured against my temple. I almost choked on my next breath, and I locked my arms around his neck. “Consequences be damned, you have to be mine.”
Oh God.
I screwed my eyes shut and tightened my hold on him, and all I could do was offer a jerky nod in response as all the emotions rendered me speechless. I sniffled and smashed my lips together to prevent an embarrassing display of the crazies.
Mine, mine, mine, mine.
I was starting to feel the urgency from him. It was in his hug, how hard he embraced me, and a forceful sense of being unable to let go. He’d thought this through. He’d made up his mind. And it was the man I knew, the man who didn’t walk a single step until he was ready to go the distance, something I’d found comfort in a million times before.
Years of tension began rolling off me, and I basked in the strangest, most overwhelming exhaustion that swept over me. It was a peaceful feeling. Like, I just wanted us to nap together in each other’s arms. No ice cream needed, no filth—yet. Just…resting and holding on.
“I love you,” I croaked. “I can’t live without you.”
He cleared his throat and gave me another squeeze. “I love you too. I think we’ve proven we’re useless without each other.”
I shuddered and buried my face against his neck.
Whenever I thought we couldn’t hug each other harder, we stepped it up, one tight squeeze after the next. Slowly but surely applying superglue to every crack.
“I’m so fucking tired,” I whispered.
“God—me too.” He hummed and kissed the side of my head. “Do you think we can bribe Colby to watch the kids for an hour or two?”
“Oh, he’s hella bribable.”
He chuckled thickly and inched back enough so we could lock eyes.
He smiled and rested his forehead to mine. “I’ve missed you for too long.”
Goddammit. My eyes welled up all over again, and I couldn’t speak.
I couldn’t comprehend that this was happening either. Was it happening? Were we back together? Had Shan succeeded?
“What, um…” Fuck, I couldn’t stop sniffling. “What happens now—are we really back together? Any, um—c-conditions? Whatever it is, I’ll agree.”
His brow furrowed with sympathy, and he brushed his thumbs under my eyes. “Baby, I don’t want you to agree to just anything—”
“Well, tough shit,” I croaked. “It’s gotta be us—so whatever it takes.”
He sniffled too, and he took a few seconds to think of his response. “I can only think of two conditions and one negotiation. Firstly, our children will not be put in harm’s way.”
“Of course not—”
“Shh.” He legit pinched my lips together, and it was accompanied by a narrowed-eyed look and a smirk he was trying to hide. “Secondly, you do not change who you are—because that’s the only Alfie I will accept. The true you.”
I nodded dutifully, lips still pinched.
“In return, I won’t put you in a position where a change in your behavior is necessary,” he went on. “I’m not on good terms with my parents at the moment, and even though something is permanently and fundamentally broken between us, I’m sure there will be family dinners in the future I have to attend. But I’ll only be there if you join me—and we don’t leave each other’s side. And if they disrespect us in any way, they’ll hear from both of us.”