Total pages in book: 142
Estimated words: 133180 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 666(@200wpm)___ 533(@250wpm)___ 444(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 133180 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 666(@200wpm)___ 533(@250wpm)___ 444(@300wpm)
He’d taken a long bath while Bishop cleaned up in the guest room. Trent left after about a half hour of talking to Bishop alone on the patio. When he’d come back inside, he stood in the center of his dining room just staring at him. Those dark eyes looking sad and tired. The reality of all that’d happened to them today slammed into him and Bishop was at his side, wrapping him tightly in his arms.
Edison’s quilt fell from around his shoulders as he held Bishop back. He knew they needed to talk and clear the air but he didn’t want to. Didn’t want Bishop to have to go through any more embarrassment. He wished there was some gesture or emotion he could display that would make everything all right.
Bishop eased out of their embrace, holding Edison’s hands. He stroked his thumb along Bishop’s palm waiting for him to say what he needed.
“It’s true, Eddie.”
Edison was quiet for a long time before he responded, “I know.”
“Have you always known?” Bishop mumbled.
Edison had to strain to hear what he was saying. “No. It seems I had to find out the hard way.”
Bishop squeezed his eyes shut. “I wanted to tell you so many times. I swear I did.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because it’s the hardest thing in the world for a grown man to admit, besides he can’t get his dick up. Only Mike and Trent knew. That’s the way it’d always been. The moment I told someone else, he used it against me not even a month later.”
“And so you thought I’d what…betray you, too… not want you anymore? Suddenly fall out of love with you?”
“Yes. It’s my worst fucking fear, Eddie. Not for you to leave me because I was a jerk, but to leave me because I don’t measure up.”
“Bishop, god. Do you know me at all?”
“I’m sorry. Yes, I do know you. I was just hoping to maybe get a few more weeks of school out of the way and then I was gonna tell you. So, you’d see that I was serious, and committed.”
“Is that the Tuesday night project you work on each week?”
Bishop didn’t answer. Instead he got up and disappeared down the hall. Edison took a few more sips of his tea when Bishop came back and set that brown ALC envelope that he’d seen earlier, on the table. “I don’t just do this on Tuesdays, I do it every day. Even if it’s only for twenty minutes on my lunch break, I work on this.”
“What is it?” Edison asked, sitting forward.
“I uh. I enrolled a few weeks ago.” Bishop ducked his head when he removed the thin booklet and the lined paper he used to practice his handwriting from inside the envelope and spread it out on the table. “I’m still on level one, book two, or um, the beginning level. I thought after a few months or something I could show you something different than this. The book looks real childish I know but…” Bishop gripped his forehead.
“This is the Adult Learning Center’s GED program?”
Bishop wrung his hands so hard his knuckles popped. “Sort of. Like an extension of it. I’ll get to those classes eventually.” Bishop swallowed so roughly Edison heard it. “Since I can’t read well enough for the prep courses. I have to take these um… like… um, pre-prep… Shit.”
Edison reached out for Bishop’s hand, but he yanked it away before he could touch him.
“I don’t want any pity, Edison. I can do this okay. I know it’s a long way to go but I’m not a quitter. I’ll never give up,” Bishop said, frown lines creasing his forehead.
“I know you won’t,” was all Edison said, his heart exploding with so much love for Bishop he wasn’t sure he had room for more. Mike had told Edison that he didn’t make sure Bishop went to school and instead had taught him street smarts to survive. “And I don’t have any pity for you. I respect you so darn much, you just don’t understand. The fact that you’ve soldiered through every obstacle in your life only makes me even more infatuated with you. Only makes me want to be worthy of your love.”
“Just don’t judge me,” Bishop said painfully. “Please.”
“Never.” Edison shook his head. How did he get Bishop to understand that they were better than okay? That this changed nothing for him, except for the better. He guessed he’d just have to show him. He got up and turned off the one light in the living room and led Bishop to their bedroom. After tonight, he’d want Bishop with him all the time. Night and day. Bishop was his and he’d be Bishop’s.
Edison led them to his bed, his mind and body needing this connection with Bishop. He needed to see that nothing had changed for him. He turned and ran his hands up Bishop’s bare, hairy chest, letting one hand rest over his heart. He leaned in and placed his lips there, lingering for a long moment. He felt Bishop’s arms surround his waist, and Edison kept up his ministrations. He kissed all over those firm pecs until Bishop started to push them backward. His hair was gripped and his head tilted back so Bishop had full access to his mouth. He opened and fed Bishop his tongue, letting him suck on it until he couldn’t stop moaning. Thick fingers dragged through his hair then massaged his scalp.