Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 75871 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75871 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
“Do you believe him?”
“Does it matter? It won’t change how I feel about him. I can’t ever forgive him.” Maybe Vince should be the bigger man, but he didn’t want to be. Fuck Greg. He’d be happy if he never had to see Gregory again. But then, he still couldn’t deny the part of him that focused on the little voice in his head that said, It must be something wrong with you. He’s in love. He’s getting married. What did you do wrong?
“He doesn’t deserve you.” Colby tentatively reached out and brushed the back of his hand against Vince’s cheek. It was so sweet, so intimate, like he wasn’t sure if he should do it but wanting to comfort Vince at the same time.
“I know that. I do. Most of the time, but…” But what? He couldn’t figure out how to finish that without it sounding as if he wanted Greg back, and he didn’t. As if he still loved Greg, and that wasn’t the case either. He could never love someone who had been as cruel to him as Greg had. Vince just didn’t have it in him.
“I get it,” Colby said without Vince having to explain. “I think, at least, because I feel the same about Lulu and the other women I’ve dated. I don’t love Lulu. I don’t want to be in a relationship with her, and I want her to be happy, but still, when I see her with her fiancé, it makes me feel…alone. Like there’s something wrong with me.”
And just like that, everything fell into place. All the mixed-up and random pieces of Vince’s feelings became a whole picture, painted by his new closest friend. “How did I know you’d get it? That I wouldn’t need the words for it myself because you would have them? Just like earlier when I was still upset and you came around, trying to seduce me, and I instantly felt better.”
Colby playfully rolled his eyes. “I’m not sure about seducing.”
“That’s basically what you did. You dragged me into the shop and tried to have your way with me.”
“Dragged is a pretty strong word.” Colby chuckled, then added, “But I did want to have my way with you.”
“You and me both.”
“I’m sorry he upset you today, and I’m sorry about everything he put you through. I don’t really understand how I help, but I’m glad I do.”
There wasn’t a part of Vince that didn’t believe Colby really thought that way, that he didn’t see how incredible he was. It wasn’t because of any kind of mistreatment. It wasn’t because he didn’t have a loving and supportive family, even if they were imperfect and sometimes said and did the wrong things. Sometimes certain things about people were just engrained in who they were. And for whatever reason, Colby didn’t see that he was one of the best people Vince had ever known, one of the best people most would ever know. “What am I going to do with you, Colby Covington?” He brushed the hair back from Colby’s forehead.
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing. I just like you a whole lot, is all.”
Colby was quiet for a moment, and Vince couldn’t help wondering if he’d gone too far. If what he’d said had made Colby uncomfortable. Maybe he thought Vince was going to start pushing for more. He wouldn’t, but a part of him he hadn’t realized was there until tonight wished the situation were different. Wished he could trust himself to fall for someone, wished Colby wanted a relationship too because the two of them were really fucking good together. If Vince let himself, he could fall for Colby, and that was a scary truth.
He would never flip the script on Colby now, wouldn’t say anything to make Colby feel like there was pressure on him to be someone other than who he’d told Vince he was, someone who, like Vince, didn’t want a relationship. And Vince still didn’t…right? No. He wouldn’t allow it. He could never risk what he and Colby had.
“I like you a whole lot too,” Colby finally answered, his voice soft but steady. He looked away, rolled onto his back, as if needing them to take a step back. Honestly, Vince would be smart to do that too, so he changed the subject.
“Before you saved the day, when I was working with the vegetables, I was thinking again about how much I love it. Growing fruits and vegetables, nurturing them…it feels strangely important.”
“It is important, and you’re good at it. I don’t love it like I should.”
“Shit. I didn’t mean that. I wasn’t trying to make you—”
“I know. You didn’t. I just thought about it, is all. I love the farm and always will, but I really don’t think it’s my dream.”
Colby wanted to brew beer. There wasn’t a doubt in Vince’s mind about that.