Total pages in book: 58
Estimated words: 54055 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 270(@200wpm)___ 216(@250wpm)___ 180(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 54055 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 270(@200wpm)___ 216(@250wpm)___ 180(@300wpm)
“I was in the neighborhood,” he said, deflecting. I decided to let him off the hook for now and not press the issue. He’d tell me when he was up to getting whatever was weighing him down off his chest.
“I need to check on Lena.” It was a lame excuse, but I needed a moment to myself. Alex was a lot of things, but he wasn’t a liar, had never lied to me anyway, and he wouldn’t have hesitated to give me shit if Lucy had flirted with him. All of that meant I had horribly misread the situation and said terrible things to Lucy.
I need to apologize.
But somehow I felt myself hesitating as I left the kitchen. Probably because I couldn’t think of what I could possibly say that would redeem myself to Lucy. Later. I would apologize later.
After I checked in on Lena, finding her busily coloring in her unicorn colouring book, I went out back and found Alex out on the terrace with a beer in his hand, his gaze unfocused on the distance. “Are you sure you’re all right?”
“I’m great,” he answered in that breezy way of his. “Just needed a break and figured I’d come see you. Maybe you should stop worrying about me and go apologize to Lucy.”
“I will, once she’s had time to cool down.”
Alex shrugged. “If you wait you’re just giving her time to come to terms with leaving Lena. And you.”
I sighed heavily and shook my head. “Right now, we both might say something we regret, which will result in the same thing, her leaving. I need to clear my head first.”
That moment never came though. Lucy refused to join us for dinner, and when I stood outside her door before heading to bed, there was nothing but silence.
There would be no more midnight sandwiches, unfortunately.
Chapter 25
Lucy
Ican’t even be surprised because I knew this would happen.
I knew Dante would turn into an even bigger jerk than his default setting, which should have been reason number one to avoid getting tangled up with him, but I didn’t think it would happen so soon. I figured, in my eternal optimism, that it would take a few weeks of naked time before he reverted into acting like an ass instead of ending things.
But things played out the way they had, and no amount of wishing or overanalyzing was going to change that, even if that’s what I wanted.
Thankfully it wasn’t what I wanted. I didn’t want to change a thing that had happened, because I was a firm believer in believing people when they showed you who they were. Dante thought that I would trade up as he called it, and not just with some rich guy, but with his best friend. That’s what he thought of me.
So I kept an emotional distance the way all childcare professionals were advised to do. It was difficult to be emotionally detached when dealing with small, vulnerable children. It was easy to let yourself pretend you were part of the family when you were nothing but the help. An employee. It was a lesson I’d learned the hard way when I first started out, and even though I promised myself I would never make that mistake again, here I was.
Making that same mistake, no not the same mistake, but worse this time round.
So yeah, I kept an emotional distance for the rest of Alex’s visit and beyond. I made sure I never forgot my role again. I was the nanny. Paid to teach and babysit Lena, nothing else. I wasn’t a family friend or a girlfriend or a lover. I was paid to be here and allowed to live in a suite of rooms as part of my salary. So I stayed in my room when I wasn’t on the clock. No more family dinners or movies. It was a lonely existence, but it gave me plenty of time to research fun but educational activities to do with Lena.
Thursday evening rolled around, and I sent a quick message to Toni, hoping I wasn’t interrupting her with her charge. “Is it all right if I stay at your place this weekend?”
She replied immediately. “You don’t even have to ask.”
I smiled, grateful to have such a good friend. “I just wanted to check since you refuse to let me pay rent.” I knew she didn’t need the money, but it made it hard to think of the spare room as mine when I didn’t pay for it.
My phone rang instantly and I answered with a smile. “The place is paid for Lucy, and I’m not in the habit of making money off of my friends. If you want to help out, keep it clean and pick up the mail, and feel free to stock the fridge with snacks and booze.”