Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 89772 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 449(@200wpm)___ 359(@250wpm)___ 299(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 89772 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 449(@200wpm)___ 359(@250wpm)___ 299(@300wpm)
“Princesa—”
“Their marriage was a double standard in every aspect. He had cameras all over the house to watch her every move, though she couldn’t know where he was, who he was with, what time he was coming home. If…he was coming home at all. A huge part of my memories from my childhood are based on his temper and short fuse. I remember one time a man told my mother she was beautiful, and my father ran him off the road and beat him within an inch of his life. He got back in the car and we went to dinner like nothing happened. What the fuck kind of bullshit is that?”
“Sienna—”
“Oh! But the most memorable was when he put his hands on her. My mother was tough, it was one of the reasons he chose her as his wife. He knew she could handle the brutality of this world. You think I have a mouth? You have no idea how much of an attitude she had when it came to my father’s infidelities. She set his car on fire once and then ended up dying in another one. The irony, right? Sometimes the only way to shut her up was with a heavy hand. And trust me, my father had one,” I hesitated for a second, gathering my thoughts.
“I think that’s why he never remarried, he knew he’d never find another woman to put up with his shit like my mother did.”
He stepped in my direction. “Don’t.” I halted his steps, aware he wanted to comfort me, and I wasn’t ready to accept his sympathy. I didn’t tell him all this for his compassion. If anything, I despised feeling powerless by the history of my life I was openly sharing with him. I figured I didn’t have anything else to lose but everything to gain from this honest conversation.
“I hated watching them fight. Sometimes I think she maybe wanted to die. It was her only way out of this world. You enter alive, you exit dead, right? Isn’t that how it goes?” I shook my head, trying to shove away one of hundreds of memories I had. Governing the tears about to unleash from my eyes.
“My father has always been a very selfish man. Except when it came to me. I was his little girl, his pride and joy. He showed me off just as much as he did my mother. We were his whole life. It was a toxic marriage, Cruz. He’s never, ever hurt me, until I walked into his office four months ago and he told me I’d be marrying you. No, not told. Ordered. This was the first time he used me like he did her for his own advantage. I didn’t want to hate him, but God forgive me, I did.”
I didn’t stop, I couldn’t. I spoke my last truth, “I see so much of him in you and that scares the living shit out of me. I promised myself a long time ago, I wouldn’t be the wife that looked the other way to have the life of luxury at the expense of loyalty and respect from my husband. I won’t give my soul to anyone who doesn’t deserve it, so stop expecting me to.”
Lifting my chin high, I stood my ground. “You have to earn it. Simply because I’m worth that much.”
I said it. There was no going back. We were stuck in the present. The only way to go, was moving forward.
Together.
Or apart.
Our stares stayed connected for what felt like an eternity. Him on one side of the room, me on the other. My baggage in between. I wouldn’t take a step in his direction if he wanted to mend the bridge concerning us, then he needed to do it on his own.
In three long strides, he was standing in front of me as if he read my thoughts. Brushing the hair away from my face, he profoundly gazed into my eyes.
“First of all, let’s make a few things crystal fucking clear shall we? You have it all wrong, Sin. I wasn’t trying to punish you by having you marry me. I wanted you. I still do. I won’t ever stop wanting you. The night of your graduation party, you were a gift walking into that ballroom. I watched you, and when you finally made your way to me, I knew I needed to have you. Under me, on top of me, in and out of the bedroom.”
“So it’s about sex?”
“I’m a man. It’s always about sex. The self-control I’ve had with you these last three months could move fucking mountains. Another reason I choose not to be here. I want your body as much as I want your heart. Your soul. I want that too. I may sound similar to your father in many ways, but I’m also my own person. The marriage my parents have is nothing like what you experienced with yours. The sun rises and sets with my mother. My father worships her, he has since the second he laid eyes on her. All my life I’ve heard about their love, from his mouth and hers. That is how I feel about you, Sienna. From the moment I saw you walk into that room, I was yours.”