Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 58808 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 294(@200wpm)___ 235(@250wpm)___ 196(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 58808 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 294(@200wpm)___ 235(@250wpm)___ 196(@300wpm)
So it was a mutually beneficial arrangement: Eric had the freedom of a married omega and made himself scarce whenever Simon Hendrick—his husband’s lover—visited them. It was fine. Life was fine.
He was a little lonely though. Just a little.
Or a lot.
There was a part of him, a part he tried hard to quash, that felt neglected and yearned for something else. That part of him looked at his empty, lonely life and wondered, Is this it? Is this what the rest of my life going to be like?
The loneliness was crushing sometimes. Even visiting his brothers didn’t help. They had happy families. Mates they were utterly in love with. Eric tried not to compare things, but it was unavoidable when he saw Jules laughing in his husband’s arms or Liam snuggled up to his mate in front of their fireplace. It made his heart hurt with poisonous envy, and he hated it. He wasn’t that person. He didn’t want to be that person. He didn’t begrudge his siblings their happiness, the rare connections they’d managed to find. But he couldn’t help feeling envious. Envious and so very alone.
The feeling got worse when he saw his siblings with their kids. It made him painfully aware of his quiet, empty house—and his quiet, empty heart.
There would never be a tiny hand reaching for his for support. He would never be called papa. He would never be loved like only a child loved their parent. He would never be a small little person’s favorite person.
He would die alone.
Eric tried not to think such depressing thoughts—he was just twenty-two, for fuck’s sake, he had his whole life ahead of him—but that line of thinking didn’t help much. The thoughts about the empty, lonely decades ahead were daunting.
Greg was the one to suggest it.
“I can see you’re lonely,” he said that evening after Simon left. “Why don’t we get a kid? The Ascott estate will eventually need an heir anyway.”
Eric stared at him before smiling.
***
The problem with that plan was, to have a child you normally had to have sex first.
Eric was probably the only virgin married omega in existence.
Granted, the mere concept of virginity seemed ridiculous, given his experiences, but he’d never been fucked with a real cock or knotted. So in that sense of the word, Eric was still very much a virgin. At twenty-two. By that age most omegas had a couple of kids already.
Sleeping with Greg wasn’t an option: Simon vetoed it.
“No offense, Eric, but it’s bad enough that in the eyes of the law he belongs to you. I’m not letting him make that marriage real.”
Eric nodded. Truth be told, he felt more than a little relieved. Despite Greg being fairly handsome, compatible, and smelling nice, the prospect of having sex with him made Eric… queasy. He tried not to dwell on the reasons of it much. He tried not to think about… him.
Him.
At the beginning, in those first horrible months, he had been the only person Eric could think about. With the sudden absence of Hugh in his life, his hormonal imbalance had come back with vengeance. He had nearly died. It was a miracle he hadn’t, actually. His siblings had been furious that he’d kept them in the dark about his health issues.
After spending months in the hospital with the best medical care money and connections could buy, Eric had slowly recovered. But his health had still been so fragile that the doctors advised Anthony to find Eric a compatible alpha to stabilize him long-term. Greg had been a lucky find, all things considered. It could have been much worse.
To this day, Eric remembered the tight, regretful look in Ant’s eyes at Eric’s small wedding. This isn’t what I wanted for you, he’d said.
It wasn’t what Eric had wanted for himself, either, but such was life. Not everyone got to have a fairytale happy ending. It was… fine.
Anyway. Greg couldn’t have sex with him to give him a baby.
That left artificial insemination.
The problem was, it was extremely difficult for a male omega to get pregnant through artificial insemination. There were just twenty-nine documented cases, which wasn’t exactly encouraging.
“Don’t worry, dear,” Greg said distractedly when Eric shared with him his concerns. “I’ve already booked an appointment for us with a great AO clinic. I’m sure they’ll figure it out.”
Eric winced, not exactly having had a good experience with AO doctors, but rationally he knew it was a good idea. The smart idea.
“All right,” Eric said. “When is the appointment?”
Greg looked at his watch. “In half an hour.”
Eric suppressed a long-suffering sigh. It was just like Greg to forget to warn him beforehand. It was a quirk of his that never ceased to exasperate Eric.
“All right,” he said, not bothering to express his displeasure. It was pointless, because Greg never really listened to him. As in, didn’t pay attention to his words, his attention elsewhere.