Total pages in book: 123
Estimated words: 115468 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 577(@200wpm)___ 462(@250wpm)___ 385(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 115468 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 577(@200wpm)___ 462(@250wpm)___ 385(@300wpm)
“I don’t think that was your mistake.”
“Then what was it, wise one?”
Romeo leaned forward, looking me in the eye. “It seems to me, you didn’t make the wrong choice in locations, you made the wrong choice by coming back.”
I grunted. “I had to come back. My life is here in Mud Gulch. And…Gage’s life is in London.”
“You could have asked him to stay.”
I sat back and shook my head. “No. No I couldn’t do that. So many plans had already been made. So many people are depending on him. I couldn’t tear him in yet another direction. I couldn’t add another layer of pressure, Romeo. And if I did ask, and by some miracle he did stay, I couldn’t live with wondering whose choice it really was. Gage is naturally inclined to want to please people he cares about. And I love…I…respect that about him. But he’s done enough of that. I refuse to be another person making demands of him. God, look what I did to you. Look what happened to your dreams because of me. Even if the situation is different, I can’t derail someone else’s life.”
He stared at me for a moment, understanding coming into his eyes. “Ah. I see.” He turned and set another glass on the shelf. “That’s what you think? That everyone is forced to give up the life they’re meant for because of you? That you’re a dream-killer?”
Dream-killer. I couldn’t help cringing. He’d hit the nail on the head.
I didn’t want Gage to give up on his dreams. In fact, I was hoping he’d strive for his own over attempting to constantly fulfill the desires of others. But being with me would mean sacrificing the respect of his family, and that of his community as well. I couldn’t ask that of anyone, not when I had another option. I’d already done that once.
Romeo braced his hands on the bar. “That’s it, isn’t it? Loving you always involves some amount of sacrifice. Of losing.”
“It did for you,” I whispered, the terrible truth puffing from my lips like poison vapor.
“Mm,” he hummed, giving me a nod of concession that made my stomach tighten in misery. “I could be so many things other than a”—he made a face of disgust—“bartender.”
I bobbed my head in agreement. “You could be so much more.” My shoulders slumped, the weight of the sacrifice he’d made for me weighing me down. But it was good that we talk about it, wasn’t it? Even if I hadn’t exactly come back an heiress capable of sending him on that long-awaited trip around the world. “Look at you, Romeo. You could be anyone anywhere. So many doors would open for you if you stepped out of Mud Gulch.”
“What doors? Fame? Fortune?”
I shrugged. “For starters.” And maybe he still could. Maybe I could still find a way. A Plan B. An alternate route out of here for him. I just had to set this misery aside, so I could think.
“Jesus, you’re full of it.” Romeo laughed, surprising me as my gaze flew to his. “Rory, look at some of the people who already have all that. You’ve gotten an up close and personal view recently of the joy riches and clout bring. Do those people seem happier to you? Do they seem more joyful? Or even satisfied?”
“I…what? I mean, some of—”
“Regardless, I never wanted any of that.”
I stared at him in confusion. How could he not want that? It had been his plan. His dream. “But you were leaving,” I reminded him. “You had one foot out the door.” Before me. Before I made him cancel all his plans.
“Yeah and I probably would have been back in a week. I would have missed this place and these people because it’s home and I love it here.”
“You’re lying to make me feel better. And I appreciate the kindness, but, Romeo, you and I well know your face could have been your ticket in to anywhere.”
He leaned forward, giving me an up-close view of that beautiful, legendary face of his that had once caused a woman tourist to walk right off the dock into the water. “I don’t want to be loved for my face, Rory. I want to be loved for my heart and my work ethic. I want to be loved for me, same as you and everyone else on this wide green earth. And someday I’ll find that woman, whether she’s already here, or whether she’s passing through town and the mud pulls at her feet and asks her to stay.” His lips tipped. “I’ll find her and I’ll marry her and have a few kids who’ll either be pulled to stay, or pulled to leave.” He leaned forward. “And someday, this mug of mine will be dust in the ground, but the love I shared will never die because love is more than skin and bones.”