Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 97417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
“Maybe. It’s not like I could have done anything different though. They’ve been riding me every fucking minute since you left. The only reason I can be here now is because I start at Columbia this fall and I’m in the city for a prelim course.”
“Wow, Columbia. That’s big.” Ansel patted himself on the back for portraying the perfect amount of impressed while his stomach curdled with jealousy. Once upon a time, he’d dreamed of going to Columbia to study English Lit, before shit got really bad at home. When he’d made the choice to run, it had been a life or death decision.
His mother might not have literally killed him, but his spirit would have suffered an agonizingly slow demise. The day he’d walked out the door was the same day he said goodbye to his dreams of studying the greatest writers in history. He hadn’t opened a book since.
“They have a good medical program.”
“She’s still harping on about that? She’s always been obsessed with having a doctor in the family.”
Lars didn’t meet his eye. “It’s not that bad. I don’t hate the idea as much as you did.”
“Good.” He really hoped his brother wasn’t being browbeaten into a profession, a life, he didn’t want. “So, how long are you in the city?”
Their drinks arrived and Lars took a sip before answering. “I have to go back to Connecticut tomorrow morning. It was just a weekend program.”
“Oh.” Ansel swirled his straw through the ice cubes in his glass. “Listen...” He paused and looked up. “I’m having a few friends over for dinner tonight. It’s a casual thing. We do it every Sunday. I’m cooking spätzle.”
“Okay.”
“Do you want to come over? I could use some help making the salad.”
Lars grinned. “Sure.” There were no lines on his face, no strain in his eyes, and no sharp edge to his smile.
In comparison to Ansel’s own, his brother’s life had been easy. So fucking easy. The bitterness on his tongue tasted like the blood and tears of a childhood spent in fear, and the sweat of a lost adolescence.
But then Lars added, “I’d love to come,” and Ansel shook off his envy.
None of it was his brother’s doing.
Truth was, his brother’s acceptance went a long way toward healing wounds that were still fresh, even after six years.
Chapter Seventeen
Ansel and Lars were in the kitchen putting the final touches on dinner when the boys arrived around six that evening. Ange opened the door and let out a high-pitched squeal before hugging all three of them at once.
“You guys, I missed you. Why do you only visit when Sparkle Pants cooks?”
“Sparkle Pants?” Lars asked.
“Jesus, you just saw them last week, woman,” Ansel chided before sipping his vodka on the rocks. Then to his brother, “Don’t repeat that, if you want to live.”
“Oh, who’s the hot dish?” Z strutted forward with an extra sway and pointed a perfectly manicured finger at Lars.
“Stop it, ho.” Lirim hip-checked him out of the way and curled his lips in a coy smile.
“Knock it off. This is my baby brother, Lars. And if any of you sluts touch him, I will chop off your hair while you sleep, I swear to God.”
“Damn, girl. Talk about going full psycho. Nobody better touch my hair.” Z waved his hand around dramatically.
“Your brother?” Tam’s big eyes went wide.
With a hesitant shrug, Ansel tried to portray everything he was feeling. Luckily, Tam was part mind reader because his return grin was huge.
Out of all of them, Tam knew the most about Ansel’s past. Not because they’d known each other the longest, but because when they’d first met at the shelter Tam had been in a really bad place. Ansel had shared his own awful story in an effort to bring Tam out of his shell. Knowing he wasn’t alone had helped Tam make changes.
“Sorry, they’re all insane,” Ansel said to his brother.
“They’re fun.” Lars nudged him. “Nice to meet you all.”
“Oh, honey, it’s nice to meet you too. I’m Azariah, but everyone calls me Z, ’cause I’m Zany.”
“Hi, Z, I can see that.”
Lirim pushed Z out of the way. “I’m Lirim.”
“We just call him Lirim because he’s boring.” Z snickered.
Next was Tam, who rolled his eyes. “Don’t mind them, really. I’m Tam. It’s nice to meet you. I didn’t know Ansel had any family in the city.”
“I’m here for the weekend, school thing.”
“Cool, I’m glad you could make it to dinner. Your brother is an awesome cook.”
“Thanks.”
Ange rubbed her hands together and went after Z, who was snacking on celery and carrots at the table. “I’ve been smelling food since I woke up and I’m starving. Let’s eat.”
Because of the rather small size of their kitchen, dinner was served buffet style. Everyone piled their mismatched plates with salad, cheesy spätzle, and fried onions before taking their places around the table.