Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 93425 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 467(@200wpm)___ 374(@250wpm)___ 311(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 93425 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 467(@200wpm)___ 374(@250wpm)___ 311(@300wpm)
“Do you . . . have religious beliefs against artificial insemination?”
Sebastian’s brows drew together. “Religious beliefs? What? No. Of course not.”
“So what is it, then? You haven’t been yourself since we talked about it.”
He sighed and pulled me to him for a hug. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel like you’d said or done something wrong. I think what you did, harvesting your eggs to avoid a possible future conception issue and donating some in honor of your mother, was extraordinary.”
I pulled back to look him in the eyes. “You do? Are you sure?”
He nodded. “It was a very selfless act. Hearing about what you’d done just confirmed that you are undoubtedly one of the most kindhearted and compassionate people I’ve ever met in my life.”
I exhaled with a sigh. “I’m so glad you feel that way. I really thought maybe what you’d learned made you think less of me.”
“Why would I ever think less of you for what you did?”
“I don’t know. I guess I was worried you would think it was weird that I gave away my eggs, which could very well have grown into children.” I shook my head. “You know, the fact that I may have children out there that I have nothing to do with.”
Sebastian was quiet for a moment before speaking again. “What if . . . with all the genetic testing that has become commonplace these days . . . what if you found out that you had a son or a daughter out there? Would you want to know them?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know. I guess I’d leave that up to the child. As someone who was adopted, I never wanted to know my birth parents. A lot of adopted children have a sense of abandonment and resentment toward their birth parents, but I never did. Oddly, I don’t see the decision my mother made as having anything to do with me. They didn’t even know who I was yet, so I don’t take it personally. Though I wouldn’t belittle someone who felt that way, either. I guess if one of my little eggs made it to become a real live person, and he or she wanted to know me, I’d be okay with that. But the decision should be the child’s when they are old enough to make it. Not mine.”
Sebastian face was so solemn, but he shook his head. “You’re truly a beautiful person, Sadie.”
I laughed. “I don’t know about that. But I do still feel good about what I did. So I’m relieved that it didn’t upset you. Though if it’s not that, I really would like to know what it is that’s been bothering you.”
Sebastian shook his head. “It’s nothing. But you’re right—I haven’t been in the moment the last few days. And I’m sorry about that. I didn’t mean to make you worry.”
“It’s okay. We all have ups and downs. I just hope you know I’m here to listen if something’s on your mind. It doesn’t matter what it is.”
Sebastian cupped my cheeks. “I know. And that’s why I’m crazy about you.”
I smiled. “I’m crazy about you, too.”
Everything seemed to go back to normal after that, though Sebastian had to work even more than usual, since he no longer had a manager. I guess it made sense that it had been weighing on his mind. Since he was so busy, I’d volunteered to help out more with Birdie so that Magdalene wasn’t working eighty hours a week. Tonight I came straight from the office. I brought an arts-and-crafts project for the two of us, figuring it was Friday, and Birdie could stay up a little later. We sat at the dining room table after dinner, making friendship bracelets. The kit came with enough colorful string to make ten. Birdie was on her second and had already figured out how to weave designs.
“Wow. That one looks awesome,” I said.
“I’m making it for my best friend.”
I smiled. “She’s a lucky girl. You know, when I was your age, we made friendship bracelets with safety pins and beads. Everyone was giving them to their best friends at school. So I made one and gave it to my friend Darren. He lived next door, and we played together after school every day.”
Birdie laughed. “Your best friend was a boy?”
“Well, I thought so. But when I walked up to him at school to give him the bracelet I’d made, he was with his friends, and he acted all weird about it. He stuck it in his pocket and made it seem like he had no idea why I’d given it to him. Apparently, it wasn’t cool for a boy to be best friends with a girl, and I was the only one who didn’t know it.”
“Did you feel bad?”