Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 82255 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82255 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
“Just leave me alone,” I tell her. “Leave me alone and don’t ever come back.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
STELLA
“DO you want to hang out tonight?” Sybil tosses a gummy bear into her mouth and then does a ballet trick in the middle of the quad.
“What about Micah?” I ask. “I was beginning to think you two were permanently attached at the hip.”
“Ha-ha.” She pokes her tongue out. “Micah has a thing with his parents this weekend. I want to party.”
“As appealing as that sounds, I think I’ll have to pass,” I say.
“C’mon,” she begs. “We haven’t done something fun in ages.”
“Something fun is an entirely different concept than sneaking into the boys’ dorms to get drunk on cheap liquor while they try to molest you.”
“Ugh, when you say it like that, it does sound lame,” she agrees. “What about your secret lover? Why aren’t you over at his place getting your jollies off?”
“He’s busy.” I deflect the question and check my phone for the hundredth time. Sebastian read my texts over two hours ago, and he still hasn’t bothered to reply. I’m trying not to overthink it, but the same thought keeps playing on repeat in my head.
He’s abandoning you, just like everyone else.
“What is he busy doing exactly?” Sybil pries. “Or should I say who?”
I flinch at her question, shaking my head on autopilot. “He isn’t sleeping with anyone else.”
“How do you know that for sure?” she presses.
“Why would you say that?” I narrow my eyes in her direction, and Sybil flops back onto the grass with a dramatic sigh.
“Ugh, I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s just that men are dogs, and you can’t trust them.”
“Did Micah do something?” I ask.
“He told me he was going home for the weekend.” She squints up at the stars. “But I saw him sneaking off campus with Bethany Lind.”
“No way.” My lips pinch together. “Why would he do that to you?”
“Because that’s what guys do, Stella,” she answers as though it should be obvious. “Look at our parents. Your mom was having an affair with Luis. Who knows what your dad was doing. And I’m pretty sure my dad’s banging his secretary. So, if you ever wonder what Mr. Carter is doing on the weekends when he’s not with you, I’m just saying, don’t be surprised if you catch him dogging around too.”
Her words cut right through the last thread of my sanity as I check my phone again and type out yet another message. I’m aware that I’m starting to sound needy, but that’s because I am. Sebastian should know this by now.
“He isn’t texting you back, is he?” Sybil asks quietly.
“What?”
“You’ve been staring at that stupid phone all night. If you want to know what he’s up to, then let’s just go see.”
“You mean like… spy on him?”
“Duh.” She leans up on her elbow and studies me. “Besides, it will give us something to do.”
I want to say no, but for some reason, I find myself stumbling to my feet as Sybil hops up too. Even though this seems like the dumbest idea ever, I also want to prove to Sybil and myself that Sebastian isn’t like her boyfriends. He wouldn’t do that. But it occurs to me as we trample across the quad that Sebastian isn’t my boyfriend. I don’t know what we are, but he would never allow me to grace him with such a title.
Sybil and I sneak across campus and into the thicket of trees surrounding his house. Already, I’m making silent bets on what we’ll find. Sebastian grading papers. Sebastian drinking Japanese whisky. Sebastian getting ready to go for a long run or watching a soccer game. These are all viable options. What I don’t expect to find when we peek inside his window is Sebastian sitting at the kitchen table with a beautiful brunette.
“What the actual fuck?” Sybil hisses beside me. “I didn’t really think he’d be with anyone, Stella. I’m so sorry. This was a stupid idea. We should go.”
But I can’t go. I can’t move, and I can’t look away. The interloper glances at Sebastian with an expression of warmth and familiarity. She knows him well, and she looks like she’s close to his age. Suddenly, she tosses her head back in laughter as if he’s said something funny, but Sebastian never jokes, and I don’t get it. As if that weren’t bad enough, her arm brushes against his, and he doesn’t even move.
I want to rip her throat out. I want to cry. And worst of all, I want to beat myself up for allowing my stupid heart to catch feelings.
“It just looks like they’re having a conversation,” Sybil says, trying her best to make me feel better. “Maybe she’s an old friend.”
“Maybe.” I swallow, but it doesn’t feel true.
For five minutes, we watch them talk, and what hurts the most is knowing that I reached out to him. I texted him, and he saw my messages, and he chose to ignore them because he’s with her.