Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 64654 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 323(@200wpm)___ 259(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 64654 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 323(@200wpm)___ 259(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
“Ever the submissive, to require a strong hand.”
Barely breathing, I admit with humor, “I am a people pleaser.”
His hum of acknowledgment holds a tone of sarcasm. “Why do I think that only applies to some people?”
“That I am selective with who I please?” I ask to clarify, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks. He nods and my bottom lip slips between my teeth as I attempt to recall what my dream was this morning. So I can tell him exactly how I’d like to please him.
“One time my friend told me to have some dignity. She thought sex wasn’t a morally neutral act,” I comment, reeling in the dangerous tension and focusing on the ends of the throw blanket that have frayed over time.
His eyes narrow and I’m not certain if it’s because he disagrees with my statements or not. Either way, I focus on picking barely perceptible lint from the blanket and wait for him to say anything at all. I wait for him to tell me what to do. To establish terms. I wait for him.
“Your rewards will be varied. As will your obligations.”
“Is that so?” I push back. I only hesitate for a half second before questioning, putting out the word for both of us to hear it in no uncertain terms, “You can’t be my Dom, wouldn’t that break the rules? It would breach the contract.”
“I have no intention of fucking you while under contract,” Zander states firmly, although his cock already straining against his zipper tells me he wants to. “That doesn’t mean I can’t punish you, that I can’t reward you.”
“Zander,” I say, and I hope he can hear it in my voice. The temptation, yet at the same time, the caution.
“If you want to give me your submission, I will take care of you. I will help you. I will give you everything you need and more.” I’m floored. I’ve never told a soul. What James and I had … I’d never shared with anyone. Questions batter me, but I obey, gripping the blanket and accepting that Zander knows more than what I’ve told him. More than what I’ve told anyone.
It’s a sin to fall so deeply into the depths of desire like this. To blindly want, and devour every promise with such greed. And yet here I am. Wanting nothing but this.
“I’m scared,” I admit to him and he repositions himself, his fingers intertwining as if he needs to hold on to them to keep from touching me.
“I will never hurt you. We will establish boundaries and limits. I want this as much as I think you do. Tell me if I’m wrong.”
Heat dances along every inch of my skin as I confess, “You aren’t wrong.”
“Then do we understand one another?” he questions.
“Are you sure you can handle me?” I tease him one last time for good measure, wondering what he’ll do to me next time I give him lip. Will he turn me over and redden my ass? Will he lean me over the edge of the sofa and fuck me until I beg him to come?
My toes curl and I reach for the throw blanket, needing to hide myself right now although the additional heat is unwanted. Beggars can’t be choosers.
“I love your spirit, little bird. But you will only answer yes or no to the following questions, is that clear?” With shortened breath, I answer him yes, because I want to. I am more than willing to consider submitting to him. Little bird. I love it. He has no idea what it means to be called little bird. A flightless one who used to sing.
As he leans back in the chair, my gaze slips down to his jeans, specifically his cock that presses against his zipper and down his thigh. He doesn’t even try to hide it.
“Have you used hand signals before?” he questions.
“Yes.”
“Good. This relationship will be between us and only us. Is that understood?”
“Yes.”
“I will use signals when we are with company. And you will obey them as swiftly as possible or receive punishment. Is that understood?”
“Yes,” I answer and if I ever had any shame, I’d feel it now at my eagerness. Truth be told, I feel nothing but desperation for us to begin. For the first time in a long time, I feel wanted, I feel excited. I feel a heated pulse that’s run cold for nearly a year now.
“Show me the commands,” he orders. “You have my permission to speak, but only to tell me the commands as you demonstrate them.” His deep, steadying breath raises his shoulders and his hands flex on the armrest before he grips them once again. It’s heady to watch a man like him resist his own desires. I want to know what will happen when he gives in. When I do what he says and he rewards both of us, fucking me the way he fantasizes about. I’m desperate to know what it’ll be like.