Total pages in book: 146
Estimated words: 141951 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 710(@200wpm)___ 568(@250wpm)___ 473(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 141951 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 710(@200wpm)___ 568(@250wpm)___ 473(@300wpm)
The burger and fries weren’t her favorite, but her mouth still watered as the hot greasiness of the food filled the Jeep’s cab. Her stomach had to join the sad chorus with a loud rumble. Even her current passenger heard the noise.
“Sorry,” she said with a mouthful of fries at Delaney’s half-hearted side glare.
“I’m just a little jealous,” Delaney admitted.
But honest with herself, too.
Delaney didn’t have the skills to eat and drive—or rather, she wouldn’t test herself in the winter on less-than-ideal road conditions, regardless of the studs in her tires.
The drive wasn’t far. Delaney remembered the small road the government trucks kept cleared to store piles of sand for easy access during stormier weather. Sure enough, five minutes up the highway, there waited a snow-cleared path with a fresh layer of sand and a pile off to the side.
The road wove around a field and up along the edge of a rock face that overlooked the highway and the Saint John River further down below. At least, the two women had a decent view while they talked and ate. As long as Delaney kept the Jeep running, they wouldn’t be bothered by the chilly winds outside.
“Here,” Callie said the moment they’d parked.
She already had Delaney’s wrapped Whopper and fries ready. Her drink sat in the cup holder with a straw shoved down the middle of the cover, too.
“Can we eat first?” Delaney asked.
She didn’t tack on the rest of the important bits to the question; Callie would understand. After all, Delaney didn’t get in her Jeep at eight in the morning and drive for two hours on a mid-weekday for nothing.
In a way, getting this far downriver had been a test. The fact she could even look down upon the Saint John River, capped in ice from one side to the other, and didn’t have a clenching pit in her stomach making her want to get away said she’d passed.
So far.
“Yeah, let’s eat,” Callie agreed.
Delaney went for her burger first. By the time she got around to her fries after sucking half of her soda dry, they had gone lukewarm. It didn’t matter. She ate those too. The saltiness made up for the lack of heat, and helped her to finish off what remained of her drink.
At some point, Callie reached over and turned on the radio. A station that focused on the top hit list in music, so every song was something recognizable or made someone want to dance along. All the noise and music did for Delaney was keep her from getting too far into the anxiety spinning a web of what ifs inside her head.
“So, you joined those trauma recovery webinars last weekend, right?” Callie asked suddenly.
Delaney, cleaning the tips of her fingers with a napkin, hadn’t been ready for the question. “Uh … yeah?”
Callie smiled gently. “Yeah like maybe, or yeah like—”
“I did both. Saturday and Sunday night.”
“And?”
“And what?” Delaney returned.
“Come on, Delaney. What did you think?”
“Honestly?”
Callie nodded, but no judgement waited on her face for Delaney. Her friendly, welcoming personality made it slightly easier for Delaney to say the hard things in front of Callie. She was one of the few people able to absorb it all without making Delaney feel ashamed or broken. Reaching out at Bexley’s suggestion had been the right thing for her to do—a step in the right direction.
“At first, I figured it was a good way to waste a weekend,” Delaney muttered.
“Hey.”
Delaney laughed, tossing the dirty napkin Callie’s way to dunk it in the bag between them. “I only thought that because I thought I was going to be on camera with a bunch of other strangers talking about this awful thing that happened to me. I didn’t realize it was meant to be more informative and—”
“Recovery based?” Callie suggested. “Like it said in the title?”
“I overthink a lot of things,” Delaney said.
Only a little defensively.
Callie didn’t prompt Delaney with another question about the webinars which gave her a second to think about them deeper than her initial feelings. In the end, it wasn’t at all what she thought it would be—only one person happened to come on screen and talk, presenting his video slide of information on PTSD and recovery from trauma. He’d professed a dislike for labels, proclaiming what hurt one might not hurt another, and everyone should be free to recover at their own speeds. That was harder to do when people felt the need to compare their pain to someone else’s in the crowd.
Mostly, Delaney got stuck on the labels. If only because they offered an answer, and she fixated on that part.
That probably hadn’t been the intention of the webinar, but it solved a big problem for Delaney. Something that had been practically laughing in her face for over a year because she had been too scared to call it out by name.