Total pages in book: 73
Estimated words: 71832 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 359(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71832 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 359(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
I keep thinking about the look on his face the last time I saw him a few weeks back.
He could’ve stormed after me, grabbed me by the wrists, and dragged me to his house.
Instead, he let me go.
I’ve held onto that, like I haven’t tried to get rid of the ring.
Over and over, despite everything, he obeyed my wishes.
That’s the one thing that keeps me coming back, because although he went too far with the stalking, the money, everything, I believe he cares about me. I believe he was sincere with it all.
I open the drawer, drop the ring inside, and slam it shut again.
Not flushed, not buried. But lost in a drawer.
Still mine, only out of sight.
The way I feel about Carson right now. Conflicted, but still there, even though I refuse to look at it directly.
There’s a knock on my doorjamb.
“Hello? Ashlyn Locke? Or I suppose I should call you Ashlyn Crowley? I’m not exactly sure where you stand with my brother at the moment.”
I jump, looking up. A man stands in the doorway. I know who he is right away, though we’ve never formally met.
Nolan’s taller than his brother. Angular and lean. Same dark hair, same eyes. Though Nolan is more severe, with a sharp chin and nose, and without the freckles.
I stand, shoving the chair back. “You’re the brother.”
“One of them.” His smile is tight. “My name’s Nolan. It’s good to meet you, though I wish we’d done this sooner, before my brother went and fucked it all up.”
I chew on my lip but accept his outstretched hand. “I’m Ash.”
“So you are.” He squeezes, holding on for a moment too long, before releasing me. “I like this place. Bottle of Smoke? Where did that name come from?”
“It’s a song by an Irish punk band called The Pogues.”
“I’ll have to look it up.” He lowers himself into the chair in front of my desk. “I know I should’ve called first, but I was hoping we could talk.”
“I’m not sure what we have to talk about.” I sit, perched on the edge. “I haven’t seen Carson in a few weeks now.”
His eyebrows raise. “I suppose you’ve forgotten all about your husband already then.”
“He’s not—” I start but stop myself. Yes, Carson is still my husband, legally at least. “We’re separated. That’s the end of it.”
“All because you found out that he’s been steering your life from a distance like a creep?” He smiles, crossing his legs. “I wonder why you ran away screaming.”
I smile back uncertainly. “It’s honestly pretty embarrassing that I never noticed.” At least I can admit that out loud. When all this first happened, I couldn’t even say the words to anyone. Time’s softening the pain.
He waves that away. “Carson can be incredibly brilliant when he wants to be. You shouldn’t feel bad for not realizing some secretive billionaire gangster’s been taking care of you anonymously for a decade. Most people wouldn’t.”
“When you put it that way.” I relax somewhat. Of all the Crowley people I’ve met so far, Nolan seems like the most normal. I know him and Carson are close, or at least they were, and I can almost see why. Carson’s intense, a little crazy, while Nolan seems much more put together. Down to earth, almost, except he’s wearing an expensive suit and his watch is probably worth more than my entire bank account.
Well, it used to be. I keep forgetting I’m rich now.
Because despite everything, Carson followed through with his word and deposited a very fat sum of money into a bank account under my name.
Nolan runs a hand through his hair. “He’s a mess now, you know. It’s almost pathetic, except this is the first time I’ve ever seen him like this. I kept thinking it would pass, but it’s been too long for me to ignore it.”
“I’m finding it hard to feel sorry for him.”
“Good. You shouldn’t.” His smirk broadens. “He’s been much too self-satisfied for a long time. I love that you’re knocking him down a peg.”
“That’s not my intention.” I lean toward him. “I’m not trying to hurt Carson at all, only I don’t know how I can ever trust him again.”
Nolan nods along like he thinks that’s eminently reasonable. “I can’t blame you. It must feel like he’s been lying to you for a very long time. But in his mind, he never misled you.”
“Explain that one to me.”
“He believes it when he says that he never would’ve gotten involved with you if it weren’t for the situation with your brother. That said, he would’ve continued on as the perfect saint, holding himself back from his base desires. You are his base desire, by the way.”
“Yes, thanks, I realized that.”
“In that sense, he believes he was true to his word. But then the pair of you got together and everything got all fucked up.” He shrugs as if it was some tiny accident.