Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 62430 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 312(@200wpm)___ 250(@250wpm)___ 208(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 62430 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 312(@200wpm)___ 250(@250wpm)___ 208(@300wpm)
“That’s great.”
“I’m gonna pay rent a couple months in advance, with what little money I have,” I explained. “If you could stop by my place once or twice to pick up the mail…”
“Consider it done,” he said.
“Thanks man. I know I don’t really deserve your help after all the crap I’ve put you through.”
“This is a big thing you’re doing,” Mike spoke, as if I needed reminding. “You’ll do great.”
I put my cup down and stood up. “Thanks for always believing in me. I think I’m not living up to your standards.”
“That’s ridiculous.” Mike could see that I had to leave and moved Elizabeth off his lap to stand up.
He circled me in a hug so strong, it brought tears to my eyes. I hoped to God I didn’t let him down again. When Mike broke it off, I gave Tammy a quick salute and patted Elizabeth on the head. All the way back to the car, I waged war against myself.
About three-quarters of me wanted to drive directly to the hospital, to check myself in and get the ball rolling. But there was that devilish minority that screamed so loud, I almost lost my nerve. It wanted to go back to my apartment, where I knew I still had some dope. It wanted to get high again and forget the life-affirming decision I had so recently made. It wanted me to throw away all the goodwill I had earned through my hard conversations, to turn my back on my best friend and my boss. It promised euphoria, and I struggled not to give in.
Driving to Nashville was an epic battle. Through turn lanes and on-ramps I saw demons and angels, both screaming at me to follow their advice. The further I got from our little town, the better. I narrowed my focus, holding the treatment center in my mind as a beacon of hope.
I fought with myself all the way to the parking garage, all the way to the front door. When I presented myself for intake, it was like a weight off my shoulders. I had made it. I’d fought the demon and won this battle. I was going to change my life for the better and win the war, and nothing could stop me.
4
GINA
That Wednesday started with a phone call on my antiquated landline. I didn’t recognize the number that woke me up. I squinted at the caller ID and decided to ignore it. The same number rang three or four more times as I brushed my teeth and fed Evil. Finally, I decided to pick it up.
“Hello?” I answered.
Silence greeted me over the line. Silence, and the sound of someone breathing. I hung up. The same number called three more times as I took my shower and made my breakfast. I was thoroughly freaked-out by the time I was ready to leave. I considered pulling the plug on the darned thing, but I was leaving the apartment anyway. What did it matter if it rang to an empty living room?
The phone rang again, and I crossed the floor to put a stop to it when I stepped right in a lovely present Evil had left for me. A slick stain of cat vomit was smeared across my hardwood floors, probably from her eating too quickly. I groaned, hopping over to the kitchen to fetch some paper towels. Tearing off a fistful, I wiped the sole of my shoe before bending down to clean up the floor.
Great. I couldn’t think of a better way to start the day. Cheer up, my sunny side encouraged me. It can only get better from here.
Unless it’s a bad omen, my pessimistic side argued. I quieted both of them, pulled the phone cord out of the wall, and locked the apartment. There were no further incidents on my walk, and I coasted into work with most of the cobwebs dusted off. I appreciated the commute more than most people. Walking gave me a chance to decompress after a particularly hard day or to charge my batteries before the shift began. This particular day, walking gave me a chance to loosen my tense muscles.
Who the heck could be so interested in pestering me as to call six times and say nothing? Unfortunately there were a lot of creepers out in the world, and a single woman in a big city had to be careful. After five blocks of pavement pounding, the whole incident started to seem less important. It had just been a computer. I had been caught in an automatic call loop, that’s all it was.
I clocked in late and added that to the list of things I was kicking myself about this morning. I tossed my bag into my locker, changed my shoes, and put up my hair. Facing the big whiteboard, I noticed that I had just one new patient that day. I flipped through my clipboard, searching for the new intake.