Total pages in book: 48
Estimated words: 44167 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 221(@200wpm)___ 177(@250wpm)___ 147(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 44167 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 221(@200wpm)___ 177(@250wpm)___ 147(@300wpm)
I’m breathing hard when I catch up and grab her by the shoulder, not just because of the exercise – after all, I’m used to long runs – but because of the pain in my chest. I don’t want her to go. I can’t let her get the wrong idea. I’ve made a mistake, and now I need to make it right – before it ends up being too late.
I couldn’t bear it if it was too late.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “Candy, wait. Please. Just hear me out.”
I don’t know what it is that changes her mind – maybe she feels bad about walking away, or she remembers when we begged Alex to listen and she didn’t. Maybe she just doesn’t want the attention of being stared at in the street while I hassle her. Whatever the reason, she stops and looks at me.
“Come and sit in the back of the car with me,” I urge her. “Bernard can drive us around – just in circles, not to anywhere in particular. If at the end of the conversation you haven’t forgiven me, we can go back to the hotel and get your bags, and I’ll take you home. I promise. Okay?”
“Fine,” Candy says, after a moment. As if on cue, Bernard happens to pull up right at that moment, giving me the opportunity to open the door for her and help her inside.
I race around the car and climb in beside her, signaling to Bernard to go ahead.
“Where to?” he asks.
“Just drive,” I tell him, not caring at all for the moment what he decides to do.
Then I turn to Candy, the most important person here. I need to explain myself to her. I need her to know why I said what I did.
“I’m not like that,” she starts, but I hold up a hand.
“I know you aren’t,” I say. “Candy, just let me explain. Please?”
She nods, and I take a deep breath. Now I actually need to talk about this, which isn’t going to be easy.
“I haven’t done this for a long time,” I say. Then I shake my head. “No – it’s probably better to say I haven’t done this, ever. I told you that Alex’s mother was a one night stand, right?”
“Right,” Candy says, quietly.
“Well, we didn’t exactly date.” I sigh. “I’m not proud of my behavior back then. I thought that one night wouldn’t mean much. It turns out, it changed my whole life. But the point is, I didn’t get any experience with dating. With doing and saying the right thing, I suppose. And since then – well, it was a few years before I even became aware that females other than my daughter existed again, and by that point, the gallery was up and running. I had a lot of money. The kind of money that makes women come after you, only because they’re interested in the life you can give them, you know?”
“When we met, I didn’t even know about that,” Candy protests.
“I’m not saying it makes sense,” I tell her. “I’m not saying it’s smart. It’s just… I guess I got used to the idea that women would only want to be with me because of the lifestyle I could give them. And when I saw you starting to pull away because of Lexie, I needed to do something. I had to persuade you. So, I showed you the one thing I’ve always found to work – not that I ever actually used it before.”
“You thought I would just give up, otherwise?” Candy says. “Finn, you have me so wrong.”
“No, I know,” I say, shaking my head. “It was stupid. I know that what we have is more than that. It’s a connection – I feel it too. It goes deeper than material things. I even risked my relationship with my daughter over it. And it was instant – from the moment I first saw you, I knew I wanted to make you mine. No – needed. I want you so badly, I just needed to make sure that you wouldn’t give up on us. Not yet.”
Candy wets her lips, and I can see her thinking, coming up with something to say. I feel a crushing squeeze against my heart. If she says that she wants to go home now…
“I feel the same way,” she says, making me let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding. “I do. I want you. But you have to promise me that from now on, you’ll trust me. You’ll trust that I know what I’m doing – that I know why I want to be here. We’re supposed to be figuring this out together, and you can’t trick me into wanting you.”
“Agreed,” I say, fervently. “I promise. But I really do enjoy spoiling you, Candy. I meant what I said. You would have this life. Not as a bribe – just because this is how I live. I would always want you to have the best of everything.”