Total pages in book: 153
Estimated words: 144571 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 723(@200wpm)___ 578(@250wpm)___ 482(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 144571 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 723(@200wpm)___ 578(@250wpm)___ 482(@300wpm)
She was naked in front of Cooper. He’d touched her before, put his hand between her legs and rubbed, but this was different. This felt more serious. Or less serious because it meant less, because they both knew this wasn’t forever.
She had to shut the voices out or she would lose it. She moved into his arms and went on her toes, pressing her lips to his again.
She let him take the lead and found herself on her back in moments, Cooper’s big body covering hers as he pressed her into the mattress. She’d worried his weight might bug her, but she liked it. He felt warm and reassuring. He kissed her, his tongue delving deep, and then pressed kisses down her neck and chest until he caught a nipple in his mouth, the sharp tug sparking something deep inside her pussy.
Desire. She’d thought she understood the word, thought she remembered how it felt to be young and to think she was in love, but this…this was a drug she could get addicted to. This was a wave she could ride and for a while be outside herself, be someone else. There was no future for them, but for a brief moment, he could be hers.
He sucked her nipple until her hands fisted in the comforter and she groaned, her toes curling. Then he worked his way down her body, kissing along her belly until he was right above her pussy.
She wouldn’t be able to take it. What if she didn’t like it? What if he didn’t like how she tasted? She was so weird, and what if this part of her was weird, too? Regular sex seemed safer. He would like regular sex and then she would know. “Cooper, just do it. I don’t need the rest.”
His head came up, eyes flashing like he was going to argue with her. There was the top who would need a sub. This was why it couldn’t work but they’d agreed to this, and she was seeing it through. She was going to know. Going to know once and for all of time that she wasn’t a virgin.
“The rest is the fun part,” he grumbled. “I told you, I won’t be able to last. I’m lucky I haven’t gone off yet.”
She didn’t want to fight and she didn’t want to lay there worried he wasn’t enjoying it. The actual sex part was something every guy liked.
She should have talked about sex with her sisters more. She tended to leave the room when Tasha and Kenz started up, and Lou blissfully didn’t seem to need to tell her everything about her sex life with TJ. She’d learned at a young age to tune her parents out. She’d gotten the meaningful stuff. Wear a condom. Sex is important. Yadda, yadda.
He was so gorgeous, and the idea of disappointing him damn near killed her. What was she doing? She was thinking again, her brain caught in a never-ending wheel moving her toward panic.
“It’ll be fine,” she insisted, tugging on his arm. What should she say? “I need you. Please, Coop.”
She needed to know. It was perverse. She’d waited all this time, and suddenly she had to know. She couldn’t wait another second, and she was well aware if Cooper drew out the foreplay she would freeze up. A vision flashed through her brain. A vision of herself laid out for a monster. Had he laid her out on a bed? Or just did whatever he’d done in the car they’d transported her in? Had he waited until they were on the plane?
“Please.” She hated to beg but she couldn’t stop the words. She was at an inflection point. She did this with Cooper and gave herself a chance at finding something normal or she might be done trying at all.
“Damn it,” Cooper cursed and lifted his hips. “I’m not even going to get my damn pants off. We can forgo the condom?”
“You know I’m on birth control,” she replied, her nerves flaring. They were doing this. It was happening. She was ready. Was she ready? “We’re both regularly tested. It’s fine.”
Cooper managed to shove his leathers down and then he was spreading her legs, lowering himself on top of her.
Suddenly his weight did bother her, but he was kissing her again and she let it go. It would be fine. This was Cooper, and she did want him. He made her feel more than anyone ever had. He could show her this world. It would be okay.
He thrust inside her, and she winced at the fullness. It wasn’t pain. Not exactly. She was all kinds of wet down there, but it also wasn’t pleasure. It wasn’t comfortable.
Cooper went still. “You feel so fucking good, baby. Better than I could have imagined.” He stared down at her, and the lust in his eyes seemed to clear. Concern replaced the desire she saw there. “Are you okay? Fuck. Baby, did I hurt you?”