Total pages in book: 79
Estimated words: 75152 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 376(@200wpm)___ 301(@250wpm)___ 251(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75152 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 376(@200wpm)___ 301(@250wpm)___ 251(@300wpm)
When I finally managed to move away from home, I promised myself I would steer clear of dangerous assholes like my father. I was determined to find someone who would not only love and respect me but would also be good to me. I thought I’d found that with James, but as luck would have it, I was wrong.
It seemed I’d inherited my mother’s dysfunctional mindset. I saw all the red flags. In fact, I’d seen them from the very beginning, especially his extreme jealousy:
“Where the hell have you been?”
“I was at the movies.”
His nostril would flare with anger as he spat, “With who?”
“Kayleigh. I told you I was going. Remember?”
“You never told me shit.”
“That’s not true, James. I told you about...”
“Why didn’t you answer your phone?” he interrupted.
“Because it was on silent.”
“That’s bullshit. You were with some guy and...”
“I was with Kayleigh.”
“I certainly hope so because I don’t know what I’d do if...”
“You don’t have to worry about that.” In hopes of calming him down, I stepped over to him and placed the palms of my hands on his chest. “You’re the only guy I want to be with. I love you.”
His expression softened, and it wasn’t long before the tension in his shoulders started to fade. In a blink, James was back to the smiling, doting boyfriend that I’d always known and loved.
But over the next few months, he became more and more possessive, and he made a huge fuss any time I mentioned spending time with my friends or even my family. At first, I pushed back, insisting that I needed that time with them, but eventually, it became too hard, and I simply stopped trying.
It was like that with so many things.
I stopped jogging after work because he didn’t like the park where I ran. He liked my undivided attention, so I stopped making calls or reading when he was at home. I knew he had his quirks and a need for control, but I simply couldn’t believe that James, the man I’d fallen so deeply in love with, was capable of physically hurting me.
I was wrong.
So very, very wrong.
Just thinking about it had my stomach twisting into a remorseful knot. I wanted to push those thoughts to the back of my mind, so I was thankful when MJ gave me a little nudge with her elbow. “Hey, Jules... You okay over there?”
“Yes, I’m sorry... I was just daydreaming there for a second,” I stammered. “I didn’t sleep all that well last night.”
“Oh?” Concern crossed her face as she asked, “Was something wrong?”
“No, I just had one of those nights. It’s fine. I’ll grab another cup of coffee at break, and that should get me back on track.”
“Don’t be silly. You don’t have to wait until break.” MJ motioned her hand toward the house. “Go get yourself a cup now, and when you get back, we’ll finish this up and get ready for the first tour.”
I nodded, then stood and headed for the house.
As I started up the steps, my mind drifted to the first time James put his hands on me.
It came as a shock to both of us.
We’d been married for less than six months, so we were still in the glorious honeymoon period. Neither of us cared that we didn’t have much money and could only afford to rent a small, two-bedroom apartment downtown. It wasn’t much, but we both loved the place. It was ours, and we couldn’t have loved it more.
I was working at the local thrift shop, and James had joined a carpentry crew with a popular contractor in our area. Things were going great, but I’d had a hell of a day at work and was exhausted. When I finally made it back to the apartment, I decided to rest for a bit.
I went into the living room and lay down on the sofa. It seemed like I’d barely closed my eyes when I felt my head being jerked forward by my hair. My eyes flew open, and I was shocked to find James towering over me.
His neck and cheeks were red with anger as he roared, “I can’t believe you!”
“James, stop! You’re hurting me!”
“I’ve been busting my ass at work all damn day, and you’re laying here sleeping?”
Without giving me a chance to respond, he gave my hair a firm yank and pulled me onto the floor with a painful thud, then dragged me toward the kitchen. “James! Let go!”
I started flailing my arms and legs, hoping to break free, but it did little good. He just kept pulling me by my hair until we reached the kitchen. “Instead of sleeping, you should be in here cooking fucking dinner!”
I didn’t respond.
I simply curled up into a ball on the floor and sobbed.
When James finally realized what he’d done, he dropped to the floor and pulled me into his arms, cradling me as he muttered, “Oh, God. I’m so sorry, Jules. I don’t know what the hell I was doing.”