Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 98652 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 493(@200wpm)___ 395(@250wpm)___ 329(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98652 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 493(@200wpm)___ 395(@250wpm)___ 329(@300wpm)
Yet even with all of the chaos Garrett had thrown my way, I’d never felt hope was gone. I’d felt disappointed, dejected, foolish, let down in a million ways, but I’d never doubted that I deserved something better that was out there just for me.
Today I finally realized why I’d felt that way—because there was someone better out there who was exactly right for me. The only problem was, that someone had just walked out my door, taking the last of my hope with him.
Chapter 32
— Natalia —
A week later, my health was back to normal, but my heart hadn’t even begun to mend. A part of me regretted how Hunter and I had said goodbye, or rather how I’d said goodbye. I’d acted immaturely, blaming him for something that really wasn’t his fault. He’d been up front with me from the start. Yet in the end, it was me who hung on to hope that he’d change his mind. It was foolish.
The thing was, I knew Hunter had feelings for me. I just didn’t know why he wouldn’t do anything about them or try to make us work. And because of that, I didn’t get real closure. It was more like I was moving on and leaving something important behind.
Yesterday, one of the dads I often spoke to during Izzy’s basketball games had asked me if the guy who’d come to the games recently was my boyfriend. It hurt so much to say no—to admit aloud that Hunter was gone from my life for good—that I hadn’t even realized why he’d asked me. When the next question came, asking if I had plans Friday night, I was completely oblivious to the fact that he was asking me out to dinner.
The poor guy had to explain what he’d meant, only to be rejected. But there was no way in hell I felt ready to jump back into the dating world yet.
So here I was, alone on Friday night, eating a pint of Cherry Garcia straight from the container while my sixteen-year-old got ready to go bowling with a boy. At least one of us had a life.
“Be home by ten,” I told her. “And Yakshit walks you up to the apartment door and waits for to you get in, or you’ll have two parents in prison when I’m done with him.”
“You’re not even scary.” Izzy smirked.
I laughed, and she hugged me goodbye—something new she’d started doing the last few days. It made me wonder if she felt bad that I’d been dumped. Either way, I’d take whatever I could get from her, however I could get it.
Just as ice-cream-overload nausea began to set in, my cell phone rang. A picture of Anna and me, cheek to cheek on her wedding day, popped up. I set the carton down on the coffee table and propped up my feet.
“Thank God. I was on track to finish off an entire pint of Ben and Jerry’s without a distraction.”
“Mmm … Chunky Monkey?”
“Nope.” I rubbed my bloated stomach. “Cherry Garcia.”
“Well, save some for after we hang up, because you’re going to need it.”
My heart started to pound in my chest. Anna and I had just talked a few days ago after I made my flight reservations for the christening. She’d mentioned that they hadn’t seen Hunter since he’d been back, but that he was coming over for dinner last night. Obviously whatever she was about to tell me was about him.
“What? If he brought a date, I don’t think I want to hear about it, Anna.”
“He came alone. He didn’t bring a date.”
I felt infinitesimally better. “Is he bringing one to the christening?”
“No. That’s not what this is about.”
I started to panic. “What’s going on?”
“Hunter got drunk last night. I mean, really drunk. And he started talking about his brother’s death and got really upset. Did you know his brother committed suicide? I didn’t until last night.”
Before the gravity of her words could sink in, I heard a wail in the background. “Shoot, Nat. Caroline just woke up. I’m sorry. I thought she’d be down for longer. Let me call you back in two minutes. I’ll grab her and settle her so we can talk.”
“Oh my God. You can’t leave me hanging for long. Hurry.”
“I will!”
* * *
I’d swapped my pint of ice cream for a glass of wine, downed the entire thing, and was filling glass number two as my cell started to ring. “God, that was ten minutes, not two.”
“I’m sorry. She was fussy.”
“Can you talk now?”
“Yes. She just latched on, so I’m going to have to talk low while I breastfeed. But it’s either that or I call you back when she’s done.”
“Start talking.”
“I don’t even know where to start.”
“At the beginning. Tell me everything.”
“Okay, well … it was a strange evening right from the start. Normally he has a beer or two. But when Derek offered him a Stella, he said he’d rather have a Jack and Coke. To be honest, it looks like he’s been hitting the bottle lately. His hair’s always a little disheveled—you know, he has that naturally messy but owns it kinda look—but last night he looked like shit. He had dark circles under his eyes, hadn’t shaved in a while, and it seemed like he’d slept in his clothes. There was some sort of unspoken communication between Derek and Hunter when he said he needed a drink. Derek nodded as if he understood, as if the two of them had done this dance before.”