Total pages in book: 221
Estimated words: 213317 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1067(@200wpm)___ 853(@250wpm)___ 711(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 213317 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1067(@200wpm)___ 853(@250wpm)___ 711(@300wpm)
I put my fork down and rise to his challenge. No doubt he expects me to confront the issue of the seedy pieces of shit that just walked out the door, but I don’t.
“Why did you pick the sapphire design on Cass’s wrist for her?”
He shrugs, nonchalantly. “The design may have been my idea, but it was most definitely up to her whether she opted to go along with it. She could have chosen a different option for herself at any point.”
“I’ll bet you were happy she did go along with it, since it was likely you who wanted her ex’s memory off her skin more than she did.”
His eyes narrow. “It should be me she’s talking to about it, not you. If that’s how she sees it, that’s how she should have expressed it. To me.”
I scoff at him. “She didn’t talk to me about it like that, actually. She said it was a gift, and the sapphire was a symbolic statement she was ready for.”
He laughs, like I’m a fool. “And of course it was. What the fuck do you think happened there? I didn’t hold her down and force the needle onto her skin. Give her some credit please. She’s a woman who knows her own mind. I haven’t forced her to do anything she hasn’t wanted to. And I never would.”
“No. I know you wouldn’t do that.”
“Good. So what’s the fucking problem? You should know me by now, Gerwyn. I never, ever make people do what they don’t want to do.”
“No, you’re just very good at convincing people what it is they want to be doing.”
He sneers at me, and it’s clear I’ve hit a nerve.
“You’d hope so. That’s my whole fucking career, after all. Earning people’s trust and confidence and helping them achieve their goals. You more than anyone should know that.”
“And that’s a great skill in the office, Ant. Fantastic. But this isn’t the office, is it? It’s life. It’s Cass’s life.”
He jabs a finger in my direction. “Don’t even try to go there. Think back to all the things I helped you up off the ground from, and all the confidence I put your way. Was that just about being in the fucking office, Ger? I don’t think so. Get off your crusading high-horse and stop deluding yourself. Not everything in the world is a mission you need to go charging after, and nobody is doing any wrong here. Least of all me. Especially not me.”
His words send me back to the point where he was my saviour and mentor, picking me up from the floor when I had nothing but hurt. He’s Ant. The man I know, and respect and love to the heart of me. He’s the man I care about more than any other in the world.
But still, even a man like Ant has his faults, and his need for absolute power is one of them.
“Be careful,” I tell him. “Cass worships you, so please just make sure she’s not worshipping you so much she’s making sacrifices she doesn’t want to be making.”
“I worship Cass. I’ll be making plenty of sacrifices of my own, just as soon as we say our vows. This part of our life will be over, the moment she says I do.”
“The mattress room part of your life, you mean?”
“Yes. The mattress room part of our life. She’ll be my wife. The mother of my children.”
I get a jab in the ribs at his words, but it’s not some distorted form of envy that has me reeling. It’s the inbuilt way he speaks about her, like her position in his world is some kind of honour, not a partnership.
“And what about the parts of her life she’s going to be sacrificing in return? Are you going to choose more symbolic tattoo designs whenever you think she needs to parade one, regardless of what the hell you’re glossing over?”
“I think one tattoo will cover that. She deserved a better piece of artwork than the memory of the cunt who betrayed her.” He pauses. “And so do you. Maybe one day you’ll realise that and go get a cover up job yourself, rather than holding on to the cheating bitch who betrayed you.”
He’s steering the conversation into a different direction, picking something that I’d normally react to, but I’m not biting this time. I shrug it off like it’s nothing.
He doesn’t like that. I see him tense up.
“Unless you really are over her now. Has something changed for you, Gerwyn? Are you finally letting Jo go? It seems that way…”
“This has nothing to do with Jo,” I say. “It’s got nothing to do with my tattoo, or who was cheating, or any of that crap. Not tonight. Tonight is purely about making sure Cass is safe and ok and on an even footing.”