Total pages in book: 67
Estimated words: 63741 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 212(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63741 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 212(@300wpm)
Lexy frowns. “What?”
“Move in with them?” Ava echoes. “Why?”
“I knew they were into you!” Lexy says.
Ava turns to her. “No, she said she had to.” Putting her full focus back on me, she asks, “What do you mean, had to?”
“I can’t believe I never told you. I’ve just been so busy. My apartment was condemned, and I had to move out on short notice. The guys saw me crying when I found out and convinced me to move in with them. They’re so close to our new location.”
“Why didn’t you call us?” Ava asks, with Lexy nodding in agreement.
“I … I didn’t want to intrude. You’re both in relationships, and you don’t need a fifth wheel involved.” I try to laugh at my little joke, but neither of them cracks a smile.
“Ember, you know that doesn’t matter. We have space for you,” Lexy says.
“Distance was a factor, too. The bus system doesn’t make things easy. I didn’t want to be a burden.”
“Friends aren’t burdens,” Ava says.
Their kindness, which of course comes as no surprise, makes me feel even worse about lying to them. They’re clearly not pleased that I never told them about this big life event, either, and I feel like a shitty friend all around.
I take a bite of a french fry, and it’s hard to swallow.
“So what’s the problem?” Ava asks. “They’re getting on your nerves?”
“Yeah, I mean, I appreciate them inviting me to stay at their house, and it’s only for a little while, but working with them all day and seeing them in the evening is a lot. Griffin steals my things just to tease me, Zeb and Griffin argue all the time, and Frank is so gruff.”
I have to call on my earlier impressions of the men to find something to complain about, and I’m both proud and ashamed when it seems I pull it off.
“Men are strange.” Ava’s attempt to commiserate isn’t very effective, thanks to the secret smile that plays at the edge of her lips. She’s enjoying her men far too much to participate in broad criticism of the male sex.
Lexy’s watching me closely, and I try to meet her eyes, so I don’t look guilty. “Are they hitting on you, or making any moves?” she asks, and when I shake my head, she frowns again. “Those guys always seemed so into you.”
“No, nothing like that,” I lie, wracking my brain for ideas on where to take the conversation next, so we can move past this topic.
For the rest of the meal, I mostly just move my food around my plate, because I’ve lost my appetite. Lying to my friends feels a million times worse than lying to my bosses, and even though I decided not to confide in them so I could ask their advice, I think I have my answers.
The fact that I have to keep secrets, and avoid telling the truth to the people closest to me, is a clear sign—a bright red one—that I need to put an end to whatever it is that’s going on between me, Griffin, Zeb, and Frank.
This isn’t how things are supposed to go, and it’s definitely not a good foundation for any sort of relationship.
I need to get serious about moving out and putting an end to the lies.
GRIFFIN
The Ember Era, as I’ve privately dubbed it, is ecstasy and agony.
Every encounter is sweeter than the one before. Every time I’m inside her, it’s right in a way nothing else ever has been.
I’ve had past relationships end badly when there was a mismatch between myself and my partner, one of us more into it than the other. I’ve been on both sides of that issue, been the one hurt and the one doing the hurting, and it sucks either way.
With Ember, I’m constantly waiting for the axe to fall, for her to decide she’s had enough and push us all away. Which we all agreed to, up front, and we have to be okay with it for her sake.
But the longer this goes on, the more it’s going to mess me up when it ends.
I know it, and I can’t change it, so I’m making the most of it, creating as many memories with her as I can, laying them up against those lonely nights to come when all I have is my fist and thoughts of Ember.
She splits her time between me, Frank, and Zeb, always one-on-one. I wouldn’t mind a group thing again, because I want as much Ember as I can get.
Even just watching and listening to her come would be more fodder for my fantasy factory. And I do imagine it, all of us with her at once. In the meantime, Ember and I are doing just about everything two people can.
And that axe is overhead, waiting to drop.