Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 85569 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 428(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85569 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 428(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
I couldn’t believe it. How could he not call? After what we went through. Was he pissed that I crept like a thief out without waking him up or saying goodbye? Surely, he was not that petty.
Did I scribble the wrong number in the dark? No way. I had the light of the phone and I was stone-cold sober. Did the note fall and he didn’t see it? That was impossible too. I had put the pen on top of it. My mind went around in circles.
The aches and bruises on my body assured me I had not hallucinated the night we shared, but perhaps it was not as amazing for him. Otherwise, why the hell couldn’t he send even one little message while I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him for even one second.
Maybe he needed a few more days.
A part of me bitterly regretted leaving that night. I had cheated myself. I should have stayed. Insisted the girls go back, called my father and cancelled our Church date. Then I should have waited for him to wake up and talked to him. Even if he rejected me then, at least, I would live in this limbo world of not knowing if he would ever call.
I had made the important decision to leave in a hurry and I had made the wrong choice. I knew that now, but there was nothing I could do to change things. All I had were beautiful memories of us entwined in bed. I felt lost and sad. When I rode out into the fields, some of the magic was gone. The colors, less bright.
But as the days passed into weeks, I became angry and disillusioned. I couldn’t forget him, but all those wonderful feelings were slipping away and all I had left was a simmering resentment. A slow-bonfire of hate. Yeah, I understood that it was a one-night stand and that was how those things inevitably ended, but to completely block me off like that after what we shared. That was just callous. Unforgivably so. At some level, I knew my hatred was my way of coping with my grief. I lost something important and special that night and it was never coming back.
“You keep staring at your phone,” my dad pointed. It was his turn to make breakfast and he was standing over the stove cooking sausages and eggs.
“Sorry,” I said looking up from my empty inbox.
“What’s going on?”
“Just Natalie. She’s having problems with her boyfriend. I’m waiting for an update.”
He brought the food over to the table. “There’s toast if you want.”
“Thanks, Dad.” I buttered a slice of toast and bit into it.
“Did something happen that night you went to Stormy City?”
I stopped with the fork midway to my mouth. “What do you mean?”
His bright blue eyes stared into mine. “What happened that night, pumpkin? You’ve never been the same since.”
I couldn’t stop the tears from running down my face. That night seemed so far away, it was almost like a figment of a dream.
“Did someone hurt you?” my father demanded angrily.
I wiped the tears away. “Nothing happened that night. I’m just tired.”
“I’ve known you since you were born,” he countered calmly, “who the hell do you think you're kidding, Buttercup?”
“It’s nothing, Dad. Really,” I insisted. “And don’t you think it’s time you stopped calling me Buttercup? I’m twenty-four.”
He stared at me worriedly. “Now I know for sure something’s wrong. I couldn’t stop calling you Buttercup if I wanted to. That’s how I think of you. Bright, sunny, wild, thriving where she isn’t supposed to, bringing beauty to field and forest alike, but beware, she ain’t no soft touch. A severe case of the runs is in store if you try to eat her.” He shook his head in wonder. “What’s going on with you, love? You used to be so happy all the time.”
I smiled through my sadness. “I did, didn’t I?”
“Yes. Always. Your mother always said she’d never seen a happier baby in her life. You were always smiling and laughing at everything.”
I nodded. I wished I could go back to being the person I was before I met him. Perhaps I would. In time. My grandfather had a saying, ‘This too will pass.’
One day this awful feeling of loss would pass and I would be whole again.
Chapter 17
Cole
37 Days Later
I was meeting a client for a breakfast meeting.
Since I was early, I ordered a coffee and had just opened my client’s file, when I heard someone whisper my name. It was starting. Two months earlier than I had thought. Still, I was ready. I kept my expression blank as I raised my face to Arianna.
Arianna had become a mystery to me. I thought I knew her and I did not. The way she had turned her back on her own daughter shocked me. Even if it was a condition imposed upon her by Paganini, God knows, he was capable of such cruelty, it was still unforgivable behavior. Not once had she called or come to visit Bianca since she went to live with him.