Total pages in book: 138
Estimated words: 137958 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 690(@200wpm)___ 552(@250wpm)___ 460(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 137958 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 690(@200wpm)___ 552(@250wpm)___ 460(@300wpm)
He brushed our lips, lifted away, opened my door, and scooted me through himself with a hand at my behind.
Like the night before, he was gazing down at me indulgently as I closed the door on him.
When I had it closed, I rested my forehead against it.
I felt Tril coming toward me.
“Silence, are you all right? Did things go well with your groom?”
“I would…like to prepare for bed on my own tonight, Tril,” I said quietly to the door.
I felt her hand light on my back.
“Oh no, my girl,” she whispered, sounding distraught. “Did he hurt you?”
“No, it was beautiful.”
“Your hair is disheveled. Did he—?”
“Please, Tril,” I begged.
“I don’t—”
I turned my head to her. “Can you unbutton me? And then I need to be at my thoughts.”
Her face screwed up. “Did he scare you?”
“No.”
“Silence, love, talk to me.”
I shook my head. “I just really need to think. Tonight was quite a bit. This country is not a’tall like our own, Tril. And tonight, that was made very clear to me.”
She examined my face, fortunately found what she needed to find, then nodded.
“I shall help you with your buttons. Come to the dressing room. Let’s get you sorted. And then, if you should need me, as ever, I am right next door.”
I loved my Tril.
She took my hand and we walked together to the dressing room.
And just like Tril, she gave me what I needed, unbuttoning my gown and leaving me.
I saw to my toilette, donned a nightgown, and entered my room, seeing that Tril had left only the lamps by my bed to blow out.
I did this one by one, then stretched out under the silks, staring at the dark ceiling.
I had nothing to give.
I came with a dowry Mars did not need for he had gold and silver and jewels and hides laid at his feet.
I had no palace.
I had no title he would want.
I certainly had no kingdom.
I was but a girl with a little bit of magic that prophecy foretold might do something extraordinary.
At the side of her king.
It wasn’t even just me who would do it.
But me being a part of Mars, and a part of six others.
I was not nothing.
I was also not anything.
I had never been anything.
Not really.
No friends.
Few suitors.
Even my father only found use for me after twenty-three years when a curse seemed to be brewing under the earth.
And Mars had told me that he would like only me for a time.
And then he wanted others.
And he would have them because he was Firenz. He was king. This was his country, his world, his way.
I would have to watch him with other women, touching them as he touched me, kissing them as he kissed me, putting his mouth where he’d given me so much that night.
The world was indeed upside down.
The Beast rising.
Cassius’s regency.
Carrington’s conniving.
A Nadirii to be wed to an Airenzian.
Two Dellish to be wed to Firenz.
But through that, I had Mars.
And going forth, I would still have him.
But he wouldn’t be mine.
I had come to Firenze with nothing that was mine.
And, even wed to a powerful king, I would go forward with nothing that was mine.
On that thought, the tears started falling.
And with them still rolling down my temples, I turned to my side, curled into myself, let them flow, and fell asleep with only their company.
All my life, I did not sleep well even in my bed in the Arbor.
Though, after the first days there, I had slept well in my bed in Catrame Palace.
Therefore, I did not know what woke me that night. Feeling distressed. Unsettled. Restless after weeping.
I was just glad I did.
Even if it changed everything.
Everything about me.
Everything about everything.
But my only other choice of outcome that night was not to be abided.
It was the whisper of the screen at the window being set down that I heard.
But it was the feel of the air that made me freeze.
This before I shouted shrilly, “Tril! Get help!”
I then rolled off the bed in the opposite direction to where I heard the noise (which was sadly farther away from the door).
I landed on my knees, my hand at the same time reaching to the dresser beside the bed where I kept a small dagger True had given me.
It had a beautifully veined malachite in the hilt.
And True had told me never to be without it.
I didn’t carry it on my person.
But I always kept it close, mostly, until that moment, simply because it had been a gift from True.
“Get help, Tril!” I yelled, hoping to all the gods she heard me, starting to open the drawer.
I didn’t get my hand on the dagger.
A man was on me.
I screamed as he threw me to my back, straddled me, his hands closing around my neck.
It was then I choked, clawed at his arms, kicked out my feet, bucked my hips, my mouth wide open, trying to pull in breath.