Total pages in book: 51
Estimated words: 48271 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 48271 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
Her expression softens with that admission.
“However, I refuse to jack off in some cup to impregnate you,” I add, not bothering to sugarcoat it. “If I’m knocking you up, we’re going to do it by fucking, and we’re going to enjoy the hell out of it.”
Her eyes flare at the candid language, another pink blush invading her cheeks. Though, this time it’s not just from embarrassment. This time it’s hued with desire. The same one I have roaring in my veins.
“Where is this coming from, Gunnar?” she asks, confusion masking her voice. “Four days ago, you thought having a baby together was the worst idea ever, and now you are suggesting this? I don’t get it.”
A heavy breath escapes my chest, my hand running through my hair as I try to find the right words. “I know. I didn’t understand it at first either. Not until I spoke with Ryland …”
She stills at the revelation, her eyes locking with mine. “You told Ryland?”
I nod, studying her reaction. Thankfully, she doesn’t seem angry, just nervous—probably because she cares about his opinion. She always has. Next to Paw, he’s been like a second father to her.
“What did he say?” she asks quietly.
“He was surprised like I was, but also said that you will make an amazing mom.”
A beautiful smile transforms her face before she dips her head. “Nice to know someone has faith in me.”
Her mumble punches me in the chest. “You being a good mother was never my concern, Ellie.”
She glances back up at me. “Then what was your concern?”
“Losing you.”
Every feature softens on her face, giving me the courage to continue.
“I didn’t realize it at first. But after talking to Ryland, I had to face some truths about our relationship.”
“Like what?” she asks, looking nervous again.
“Well, for starters, the idea of you carrying some other guy’s baby makes me fucking insane, even if it is someone you don’t know.”
A frown forms on her face. “I don’t understand. Why would that bother you?”
“I don’t know, Elle, but it does. A lot,” I admit, refusing to hold back. “So does the thought of someone else taking your virginity. Quite frankly, I don’t like the thought of any guy in your life besides me.”
A bitter laugh escapes her throat. “So, let me get this straight. You want to have this baby with me so no one else can?”
“No, but it’s those feelings that made me start to consider it,” I tell her truthfully. “The more I think about it, the more I like the idea of having a kid, but it’s something I will only do if it’s with you.”
“Why?” she asks, searching for a deeper answer.
I decide to give it to her, laying it all on the line. “Because you’re the only woman I want in my life forever.”
Her lips curve into another sweet smile, proving it was the right thing to say. “Okay, hypothetically speaking, if we were to do this, how exactly would it work?”
I raise a brow, feeling amusement fill my chest. “I know you’re a virgin and all, Elle, but surely you have some idea how it works.”
Her eyes narrow. “Not that, smart ass. I mean this”—she gestures between us—“us. Are we only going to do it until I get pregnant? Are we going to set aside certain days or are we going to have sex every day? Are you planning on still sleeping with other women? Because if that’s the case, bucko, you better think again.”
Annoyance flashes through me, her last question completely insulting. “First of all, I’d never fuck anyone else while I’m with you. You know me better than that. As for all of your other questions … maybe, no, yes.”
She blinks rapidly, trying to decode that response. “What does that mean?”
“It means you’re overthinking this, Elle.” I laugh. “We’re still gonna be us, we’re just adding sex into the mix.”
“You act like this won’t change everything.”
“Oh, it will,” I agree. “But again, so will raising a child together.”
She falls silent, knowing she can’t deny that.
“Tell me one thing,” I press, knowing this will make or break how far I push this. “Have you ever thought about this before? Us, together, like this.”
“Of course I have,” she shrieks, throwing her hands up. “Multiple times, actually.”
That confession sends a jolt straight to my core.
“I’m a twenty-four-year-old virgin for god’s sake, Gunnar. Trust me, I’ve imagined all the ways I could lose it, but at the end of the day, I’m not willing to risk our friendship over this. It would absolutely kill me.” Her voice cracks, the last words falling on a choked whisper.
“That would never happen,” I tell her adamantly.
“How can you be so sure?” Her eyes search mine, fear seeping through the light color.
“Because we made a pact, and nothing can break it. Remember?”
She shakes her head, unable to mask her worry.