Total pages in book: 81
Estimated words: 75289 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 376(@200wpm)___ 301(@250wpm)___ 251(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75289 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 376(@200wpm)___ 301(@250wpm)___ 251(@300wpm)
“You okay?” I murmur, leaning up against the frame of the old double porch swing.
She lets out a barely audible sigh, and the heaviness is even clearer. “I screwed everything up,” she tells me. “I know you felt it back there, just like I did. That was supposed to be us. If I’d stayed, we would have had a whole life together, and I’m only now just realizing how much I lost. We could have had kids by now. Been married and built the home we always talked about, but I was selfish. I was thinking about the things I wanted and wasn’t capable of seeing that there could have been other ways to get it. I should have stayed. You should have made me stay.”
I shake my head. “You would have resented me and you know it.”
Blair’s gaze falls to the snow-covered grass, her shoulders slouched forward. “I don’t know how to fix it,” she admits, her voice getting choked up. “I broke us, and now . . . I don’t know how to make the pain go away.”
Fuck. It’s one thing to miss what we had, but to be hurting like this . . . Her pain is my weakness, and if I could take the burden from her, just to make it a little easier to breathe, then I’d do it.
Inching toward her, I sit down in the space beside her, not hesitating when I reach out and wrap my arm around her slim shoulder, pulling her into my side. Blair immediately drops her head to my chest, snuggling into me as though I’m her only comfort. “I hate that you’re still hurting, B.”
“I’ve tried,” she whispers. “I’ve dated and tried opening myself up to other people, but I always fell flat. I never allowed myself a chance to grieve what we had because I knew deep down that this was always my home. I wasn’t willing to let go of it, and I . . . I miss you so damn much, Nick. I miss getting to call you every night and send you stupid texts. I miss when you would force me into your stupid truck and take me on ridiculous road trips. I miss everything, but mostly, I miss getting to be loved by you.”
“Then come home,” I tell her, enunciating every word and making sure she truly hears what I’m saying. “Come home to me.”
“What?” she breathes, pushing up from my chest and meeting my stare. Her eyes are wide, filled with equal parts shock, hope, and fear. “I . . . but I ruined us. How could you ever want me to be here again? I thought you couldn’t wait for me to leave.”
I shake my head. “The thought of you packing up and walking out of my life again brings me to my fucking knees, Blair. How can you not see that? I’m fucking terrified of getting close to you because the moment you leave . . . fuck. I won’t survive it again. I love you, Blair. I never fucking stopped, and for a long time, I wanted to hate you for how you tore us apart, but I never could.”
She leans back in, her arm twisting around my neck, and I pull her onto my lap so she straddles me. “I’m sorry,” she whispers again. “I hate that I hurt you, and I don’t know how to make it right.”
Reaching up, I take her face, holding her so damn close. “Come home to me,” I tell her again, both of us knowing it’s what’s right, where we are both meant to be.
“I . . . I don’t know,” she says as a perfectly round tear falls from her eye and streaks down her rosy cheek. “I still have so much I want to do, and this business . . . My friend back in New York thinks I can launch it as an online firm, so staying here could be plausible, but then what? What happens if I come home? Do we just pick up where we left off?”
“Yes,” I say without skipping a beat. “That’s exactly what we do. Give us a fucking chance. I know you still love me, and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that this is what you want. Take the fucking leap, Blair, and come home.”
She searches my eyes, her hands falling to mine on her waist. “You really want this? You can forgive me?”
I lift my hand to her chin, gently holding her there and capturing her stare. “There’s nothing to forgive,” I tell her. “You left Blushing to chase your dreams, and that’s not something I could ever hold against you. While it killed me having to let you go, I was also rooting for you, Blair. I wanted you to achieve everything you set out to do, and you better fucking believe that every time you got a promotion or stuck it to that dickhead boss of yours, I was cheering you on.”