Series: Peach State Stepbros Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 78418 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 392(@200wpm)___ 314(@250wpm)___ 261(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 78418 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 392(@200wpm)___ 314(@250wpm)___ 261(@300wpm)
“Lie?”
“Yeah, we were gonna tell you and Steve and Dad soon. We told Lacey first, and she was talking about all the things we needed to consider. The fact that it might not work out, and then what will we do? Colin and I were having so much fun, and we let ourselves get lost in each other. But he’s gonna go to law school. I’m gonna stay in school to be a professor. We’re both planning to go to school locally, but we’ve chosen high-demand careers, and it’s not always gonna be as easy as it is now. I don’t need a lecture.”
“Well, Lacey was right.”
I glare at her. “I said I don’t need a lecture.”
“You think it was wrong of her to bring up the practicalities you both need to consider?”
“Mom, you don’t understand. It scares me to think of a life without Colin. It terrifies me. And we had such an amazing relationship, and a part of me is like, why mess all that up when we could be amazing friends forever?”
She snickers.
“Wrong reaction, Mom.”
“I’m sorry. This is where we’re both very similar, Ash. So smart that we think everything can be boiled down to questions and answers. Life’s not that simple. Not knowing the answers can’t stop you from living.”
Finally, she’s starting to make some sense. “I’m listening…”
“I loved your father, and it didn’t work out, yes. That’s right. And I could have said, Well, it didn’t work out, and maybe no one else will either, but I didn’t. I got to know Steve and fell in love. And I know you think I’m just highly logical and that’s all there is to me, like I’m a robot, but I understand love. It might not last forever with Steve. I hope it will, but that’s all we have. Any of us.
“So maybe Colin goes to law school, and you become a professor, and it just can’t happen. Maybe something happens and you wind up never speaking to each other again. Maybe you both get bored of each other and break up that way. Maybe you meet someone else, or he meets someone else.”
“I really don’t love where this is going.”
She smiles. “Or…maybe it does work out. Because that happens too. I am a logical woman, and all those thoughts run through my head, but I’ve seen high school sweethearts make it to their deathbed, and from what I know of you and Colin, if I’m putting money on anyone, it’s the two of you. And it’s okay to be scared or worried about what might happen because that lets you know how important he is to you; it’s the day when you stop being afraid of losing him that you need to worry.”
Tears stir in my eyes.
She notices and says, “Really? I thought that was good.”
“It was good, Mom. These are tears of relief.”
She sets her hand on my shoulder and rubs…awkwardly. “There we go,” she says. I glare at her, and she grins. “Come on. That’s a joke. I’m not really that bad. Am I?”
“Just give me a hug like a normal mother.”
She moves close and puts her arms around me, drawing me in.
“You don’t think it’s weird that I’m in love with my stepbrother?”
“Oh, Ashy…I don’t know that anyone other than Colin is worthy of you.”
I cling to her tighter.
Because it’s just what I needed to hear.
It’s what I know in my fucking heart.
26
Colin
I can’t stop thinking about Ash. That’s nothing new, but normally it’s all happy thoughts—how fun he is or how good he makes me feel. The way his smile could keep me warm on the coldest of days and how good it feels to have him in my arms. The way he makes me laugh and feel like I’m important. How laughing with Ash is better than anything else in the world—okay, maybe tied with how good it feels to fuck him.
But all I can think about now is the way he looked at me when I left. The fear in his eyes that matches the fear that’s lived in my gut, in my chest, and taken over my mind since we got off the Zoom call with Mom.
I’m not supposed to make Ash feel that way.
It’s my job to make him feel better.
I always want to be the person who makes him feel better.
“T, I think your friend is broken.” Atlas pokes at my arm with his finger.
Troy snaps in front of my face. “Hello? Colin? Anyone home?”
“Ha-ha.” I shake my head, then lean back in the chair. We’re at the square table in Atlas’s dining room, the two of them flanking me. Books and laptops are laid out in front of us, but I’m doing a shitty job at studying for finals. Maybe equally as bad as being a boyfriend right now. Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with me?