Total pages in book: 53
Estimated words: 50080 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 50080 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
Get a grip. He’s getting married.
“Hey,” he says as he stands before me. He’s still wearing his stupid cable-knit sweater that makes him look stupidly good, and I hate myself a little for that being the first thought that comes into my mind.
“Go away. I’m busy.”
“I heard. Town attorney, huh?”
“Are you shocked by my ability to handle a diverse caseload?”
“Not at all.”
“Let me guess, you handle the scum businesspeople of New York. The ones who steal from the poor to pad the pockets of the rich?”
Zane doesn’t answer, and I shake my head. “Wow, you became a shark. Why am I not surprised?”
“Listen.” He pushes off the doorjamb and saunters into my office like he’s a client or someone important. Zane sits in the chair across from my desk, and I’m thankful I have a buffer between us.
“I’m busy,” I tell him, again. “I have a full caseload and Christmas town duties to oversee. I don’t have time for you or your excuses.”
“I need five minutes, Eve.”
“And I need five years ago to be today so you can look into my eyes and tell me you’re leaving, instead of not showing up as promised.”
It feels amazing to say those words to him. I drop my head into my hands and groan. I may have dreamed of having this conversation, but in reality, it’s the last thing I want to do.
“Eve,” he says my name so damn softly my insides melt. “I owe you the biggest apology ever.”
“Whatever you’re selling Zane, I’m not buying. You can’t possibly think saying I’m sorry is going to change anything. It’s over. Life moves on. You have. Congratulations. Caryn’s very nice and accommodating. Although, you might want to buy her boots if you’re planning on sticking around. Heels and Vermont don’t exactly go hand in hand during the winter. But to each their own, I suppose.”
“Are you done rambling?”
I shrug. I could ramble some more given the circumstance.
“I planned to tell you about Caryn.” Zane leans closer. Too close, in fact. I can smell his cologne—sandalwood and bergamot. After he left, I slept with his sweatshirt, and then cried tears on it until the scent was gone. That was another sad day for me, realizing his sweatshirt no longer smelled like him, but of me instead.
“But?”
“But I didn’t expect to find you at the farm. I went there to see your dad, to apologize to him first. My dad said I needed to make amends for the damage I caused you and your family. He’s not wrong. What I did was unforgivable. I was young and stupid, guided by powerful men and the promise of money. I got caught up in the lifestyle, the parties, the endlessness of it all. Before I knew it, you’d changed your number and when I went to Boston to see you, I found out you’d moved. My dad was so angry with me, telling me how disappointed he was. So, I thought to the hell with it and stayed.”
Zane came to Boston to see me.
Nope. Changes nothing.
“Is this where I say cool story bro? Jake says it all the time. I think it’s the hip thing to say after someone feeds you a line of reindeer droppings.”
Zane laughs. “Still swapping curse words for Christmas euphuisms?”
“Eh, what can I say?” I lift one shoulder in a weak shrug. “They’re fun.”
“They’re adorable.”
I’ll let that comment slide right under the holly jolly doormat.
“What you did for Caryn—”
“I would’ve done it for any other city slicker. Seriously though, I am busy. I have a stack of work, and I need to get back to the farm to deliver more trees to your dad.”
Why did you tell him?
“Thank you for taking care of him when I couldn’t.”
“Wouldn’t.” Again, with the verbal vomit.
“Right.” Zane sighs. “I intended to come back. Each time I had my mind made up, I convinced myself you were here, married with kids. Coming back and seeing you—”
“Instead, you brought you fiancée back to town.” I give him a pointed look.
Zane drops his head and covers his face with his hands. When he looks at me, his face is red, and his eyes are brimming with tears. “Hurting you then, and now, is the last thing I ever want to do, Eve.”
“Please leave,” I say quietly.
He stands and heads toward the door. With another look at me, he tries to smile. “Can we please sit down and talk?”
“We just did.”
Zane shakes his head. “Okay.”
I hold my breath until I hear the door shut, thankful Noelle missed all of this. It’s likely I’ll fill her in, but not right now. The wound that I had long closed is open and gaping, and I’m not ready for her or anyone else in town to see how vulnerable Zane Whitaker makes me feel.
EIGHT
ZANE
All night, I lie in bed, feeling like I’m living a lie and have been for the past five years. Seeing Evangeline today brought back so many memories, all of them amazing. But it’s only when I get to the end of those memories—the one where I destroy every promise I’ve ever made because I wasn’t man enough to stand up for myself—that I realize, in hindsight, the internship wasn’t worth it.