Total pages in book: 126
Estimated words: 123779 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 619(@200wpm)___ 495(@250wpm)___ 413(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 123779 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 619(@200wpm)___ 495(@250wpm)___ 413(@300wpm)
“The shadowlands will cease to exist before I do that,” I mutter.
Alchera
My butt hits the steps outside the sliding doors, and I wrap my arms around my shins.
Still feeling Adeth’s darkness creeping in my mind like shadowy tentacles, I can’t process the devastation of what just happened.
When Brenna sits down beside me, I can’t bring myself to talk.
Roark’s dead.
I killed him.
My chest implodes with devastating guilt and grief, but I can’t cry.
When I close my eyes and suck in a shuddering breath, Brenna wraps her arms around me and pulls me against her chest. She brushes her hand over my hair.
“It wasn’t your fault. Adeth killed him,” she whispers, her tone raw with heartache.
I can’t even shake my head to argue.
It feels as if all light has been drained from me, and only Adeth’s darkness has remained.
I have no idea what happened. One moment, I was hearing Adeth in my thoughts, and the next, I watched as Roark slumped to the floor.
The time between is filled with a shadowy haze.
Brenna lets out a sob, and I barely have enough strength to wrap my arms around her.
We lean heavily against each other as we try to process the loss we suffered.
Try to process? God, I haven’t even processed all the other shit that’s happened. It feels like every time I try to rise to my feet, something knocks me down.
I’m not strong enough for all of this, and Raighne can’t keep taking it all from me. I won’t let him suffer in my stead.
Jason comes out of the house, and when he crouches in front of us, I notice he’s holding two cups of coffee.
I shake my head, and Brenna says, “Thanks, but I don’t think either of us can stomach anything right now.”
He sets the mugs down and places his hand on my shoulder. “Is there anything I can do?”
“Just keep an eye on the others,” I whisper, my voice filled with the shadows growing in me.
“I will.” He gives my shoulder a squeeze. “I’m sorry for your loss.”
I turn my face into Brenna’s hair and hold her tighter, which makes her cling to me.
When Jason leaves, I say, “You should go back to Vaalbara.”
Brenna pulls away, giving me a what-the-hell look.
“Father and Roark died because of me. I don’t want you near me, Brenna. It’s not safe.”
“I’m here to help you,” she argues.
My features tighten as desperation and grief flay me to the bone, and my voice is thick as I say, “I don’t want to lose you as well.”
She lifts her hands to my face, and framing my cheeks, she says, “If I die on this mission, it’s not because of you. We all have our part to play, Alchera. You’re not responsible for our father and brother’s deaths. It was Adeth. Do you understand?”
We’ll never agree, and knowing this, I just nod so we can stop talking about it.
I pull Brenna’s hands away from my face, and needing to be alone, I say, “Will you check on the others?”
Brenna climbs to her feet, and after she heads back into the house, I let out a heavy breath.
I’m hit with a wave of destructive emotions that shudders through my body.
Not even a minute later, Raighne comes out and sits down beside me. I feel his warmth skirt around the edges of my mind, and unable to stop it, a sob rips from me as I throw myself at him.
His strong arms engulf me, and I’m pulled onto his lap as his essence floods every inch of me. The relief I feel when he starts to take the hellish grief and guilt from me is so intense I just slump against his chest as silent tears spiral down my cheeks.
When I start to feel better, and I’m able to think clearly, I ask, “How do you cope with everything you take from me?”
“Knowing you don’t have to feel any of it makes it bearable.”
I let out an exhausted sigh. “You’re so much stronger than me, but you can’t keep taking it all from me.”
“I can.” He presses a kiss to the top of my head. “It’s one of my talents as your guardian.”
With my mind clearer, I think about the loss we’ve suffered. “I can’t believe Roark’s gone.”
“River, too.”
God. Poor Fleur. My mother.
“Why do so many of us have to die?” I ask.
“There’s no limit to what we have to sacrifice so the human race can continue.”
A new fear bleeds into my heart, but before I can put it into words, Raighne says, “If I die, I’ll become a part of you. You’ll always feel me because we share the same soul.”
“I don’t want you to die.” A sob bursts over my lips, and wrapping my arms around him, I cling to him for all my life is worth.
“None of us know how much time we have,” he murmurs above my head. “It doesn’t help to live in fear, my little dreamer. We just have to make every second count.”