Total pages in book: 182
Estimated words: 165649 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 828(@200wpm)___ 663(@250wpm)___ 552(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 165649 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 828(@200wpm)___ 663(@250wpm)___ 552(@300wpm)
Elisabeta, you will stop this instant. Ferro snapped the command in a fierce, curt tone.
She instantly jerked to attention. She had never heard him sound like that, but it stood to reason when everyone around them seemed to regard him as the most dangerous man in the room that he could command with such a frightening voice.
You will obey me at once and stop this nonsense. I will not have my lifemate ashamed of who she is. Your greatest gift is to bring peace to those of us without solace for centuries. Hunters live in the utter gray of nothingness and yet just your presence relieves that terrible burden. It matters little if you speak. Your voice adds to the length of time your gift lasts, but you were born with a trait few have. I will not have you in any way demeaning what is one of the most highly prized and rare gifts our people have. Do I make myself clear?
She knew he was right in that she couldn’t stop herself from reaching out when someone was distressed. In the room the rising before, when there were so many ancients without lifemates, she had felt their lost emotions when they had not. While they talked to one another, discussing her, she had huddled in Ferro’s lap most of the time, silent, but she had done her best to send out soothing waves to bring as much peace as possible to those in the room who would be receptive.
She wasn’t in the best of shape, weak from the long years of being kept half-starved. Her mind was fragmented, so scattered that at times it was very difficult to think for herself. She knew Sergey had deliberately tried to beat that ability out of her. He didn’t want her thinking. He wanted to control everything in her life. He was furious that she refused to turn over her lifemate’s soul to him, too afraid of losing her to push her beyond what he’d already done.
Elisabeta, I require an answer immediately.
Ferro wasn’t going to drop it. He didn’t sound angry, but she knew he bordered on something close to it. He really didn’t like her self-derision over her talent. They were connected, and she dared to touch his mind. He really believed that her ability to bring peace to the ancient hunters was worth more than any other talent others held. He took pride in her gift and took pride in her. The fact that she felt shame offended him in some way, as if her poor opinion of herself reflected on him. She didn’t like that at all.
You are very clear, päläfertiilam. I will always remember. I am coming to you now.
She would never forget that he took pride in her ability. She would do so as well. He was right in that she couldn’t control her need to soothe those around her. That energy radiated out of her without her consent whether she wanted it to or not. She had to accept that about herself and know that as long as her lifemate took pride in her, she would, too.
I want you to feel pride in yourself because you deserve to feel it, not because I feel it, Elisabeta. You are important on your own.
She wanted to be the woman he seemed to need as his lifemate, but deep down she knew it was impossible and she was always going to disappoint him. If he compared her to Julija, she would always come up short. The comparison would be laughable. She tried not to let herself feel as if there was no hope. She would learn the things she could. Rising on her own, cleaning her body and dressing herself couldn’t be that difficult—and yet it was.
She could float easily enough out of the ground. She made herself lighter than air. That wasn’t difficult. It took several tries to clean herself to her satisfaction, and she was very self-conscious, aware Ferro was merged with her and could see everything she did. She felt like a child attempting to do the same task over and over. At some point, when she was a toddler, her parents must have shown her how to do these things, but she had no memory of the lessons. Sergey had managed to destroy her memories of her earlier life with her family. The flashes of recollection were always accompanied by pain.
Ferro didn’t show impatience. In this instance, she almost wished he would. Her hair was thick and far too long. It fell nearly to her knees and weighed heavily on her head. It felt a tangled mess and she wanted to cut it and wear it short so she didn’t have to learn to manage it.
You will not.
That was a decree. Hard. Fast. A gut reaction that almost made her smile in spite of her frustration with the mass. Ferro definitely preferred long hair. At least she’d gotten that admission out of him. Not only had she gotten that out of him, but her hair was suddenly shorter, more to her bottom than to her knees, and now clean, untangled and neatly braided.