Total pages in book: 68
Estimated words: 66962 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 335(@200wpm)___ 268(@250wpm)___ 223(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66962 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 335(@200wpm)___ 268(@250wpm)___ 223(@300wpm)
“I want to tell you about my time as a captive, but it’s not going to be easy to hear.”
I reached for his hands. “I told you I would listen if you ever wanted to talk. I want to be here for you for anything you need. I care a lot about you.” I didn’t want to freak him out by telling him I loved him, even though I knew it was true.
“Yeah, I… care a lot about you too.”
“Come on.” I patted the mattress. “Let me hold you while you talk.”
He laid on the bed, curling up on his side, and I joined him, fitting my body to his. I loved the strength and heat of him, and I hoped the position made him feel safe. I was sure he’d need that if he was going to talk about the horror he’d experienced.
“So I told you how I got the nickname Blade.”
I nodded and kissed the back of his neck.
“I never went anywhere without a knife. I usually had more than one strapped to me. I carried a gun too, but there were times when something silent that worked in close quarters was the best weapon I could have.”
I rubbed his arm and pressed tighter to him. I knew killing had been part of his job, and I was sure that, like I had, he’d learned to distance himself from it, but it still wasn’t easy to think about it like this.
“We were up against a group of insurgents. I’d taken a few of their men out using my skills, but one of my victim’s brothers had a personal vendetta against me. I was on a scouting mission. Fox was going to come with me, but he was needed elsewhere, and I insisted on going alone.”
I snuggled even tighter to him, certain he blamed himself for his choice.
“I ignored my instincts and moved closer to their camp than I should have. I was captured and taken to an underground cell, basically a suffocatingly hot cave. I was lucky to have survived the night in the heat without any water. They’d beaten me so badly I could barely move.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block out the image of him trapped like that. I rubbed his arm, wanting to soothe him.
“The next day, they started torturing me. They wanted information, and I wasn’t talking, but they also were simply having fun.”
“Jesus. That’s…” I pulled him as tightly against me as I could. “I’m so sorry.”
He drew in a breath and shuddered. “I just need to get through the rest.”
“I’m here. Talk to me.”
“They taunted me about how good I was with a knife and said they would kill me with one but slowly. They made a few cuts every time they came to see me, deep ones. I bled a lot but never enough to die. Sometimes I wished I would, but I kept trying to stay alive, though all I could really do was will myself to make it. I knew my team would come for me if I held out long enough.”
If the men weren’t already dead, I would track them down. I would do anything it took to make them pay for what they’d done.
“I had no idea how long I’d been there. It couldn’t have been as long as it felt because I’d been given very little water, and I’d lost so much blood. I don’t think I would have lived much longer. I sure as hell wouldn’t have been able to walk out of there when Grant came to get me if he’d waited another day.”
“You were still conscious?”
“Yeah. I … somehow I knew after that day’s torture that if I let myself pass out—and believe me I wanted to—I might not wake up, so I did everything I could to fight my exhaustion. When I heard yelling and gunfire, I prayed harder than I ever had, and then Grant was there. He freed me from the chains they’d used to restrain me and got me to my feet. I have no idea how I managed it, but I walked out on my own.”
“You’re amazing.” I snuggled as tightly against him as I could.
“I couldn’t touch a knife—even a kitchen one—for months, and I hadn’t used one of my combat knives until I cut you free that first night. I went to the gun range a few months after I was back in the States, but it was all I could do to pull the trigger once before I gave up and left. That’s why I… why I don’t know if I can protect you.”
Tears rolled down his face, and I just held him. “It’s okay.”
“I don’t know. I don’t know if it ever will be.”
“Blade, I’m here, and I don’t care if you never use a weapon again. I still care for you. I still want to be yours.”