Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 80689 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 403(@200wpm)___ 323(@250wpm)___ 269(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80689 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 403(@200wpm)___ 323(@250wpm)___ 269(@300wpm)
“I didn’t want to tell you this when you first came here. I thought it might scare you off. But Ryan is a killer.”
That wasn’t what I was expecting at all. He might as well have decked me.
“What?”
“Sorry. I don’t mean like in cold blood. He doesn’t need a knife. I shouldn’t have even told you this, but I guess now that I have, I should be out with it. You deserve to know.”
I also know that Simon doesn’t accidentally reveal anything. Even this moment has been crafted.
“Kieran, the man you look like…Ryan killed him.” His gaze meets mine again. “And then he killed our father.”
My mind’s spinning. What the hell is he on about? That can’t be true. It’s a malicious lie, given what I know not just about Ryan’s character, but about the pain his memories of Kieran and his father bring him.
Tension rises in me, and I’m tempted to call Simon a fucking liar, but I bite my tongue.
As Simon watches me, I realize this could all be a test. Simon wanting to see if I’ll lose it and defend Ryan. And then he’d know I’d aligned myself with Ryan, and I’d be as fucked as if I went to visit my sister.
What a piece of shit.
Simon continues staring me down, and I summon the strength to push out, “What happened?” in as measured a tone as I can muster.
“I had feelings for Kieran. Intense feelings, and so did Ryan. I guess it’s no secret, I know you’ve discussed him with Nell and Ryan. Nell used to hint that there was something wrong with how we acted toward one another. How close we would sit. How we might kiss a little too long when we greeted each other. When one of us would make fun of the other getting aroused if we sat in each other’s laps. Most of the staff back then knew we shouldn’t have been that close, but no one stopped us. We fell in love with Kieran. I guess it makes sense that twins would be drawn to the same man. As Kieran and I became close, I had to learn to keep secrets from Ryan, something we’d never done before. I knew he’d be envious. I knew he’d be angry with Kieran if he found out.
“Four years ago, the summer we turned eighteen, Ryan and I were so excited about attending Emory University. We had such dreams about getting out, socializing, making friends…exploring beyond the walls of Hawthorne Heights. Kieran was intelligent, but he was never interested in schoolwork or tests, and he knew college wasn’t for him. Campus isn’t far, but we both knew it was going to be hell. We were so used to seeing each other constantly that we took advantage of every moment before then…until, well, let’s just say Ryan discovered that Kieran and I were in love…”
Based on what Ryan told me, that sounds like a generous phrasing for what he discovered.
“Ryan decided to get back at me by taking Kieran for himself. He seduced Kieran, and I caught them in the act, behind the shed, surely staged for me to see. I was so hurt, so betrayed by what Kieran had done. I hated them both. And the next day, Ryan and Kieran disappeared into the woods for hours. Only Ryan returned to tell us Kieran had fallen to his death at the drop-off.”
Despite how calculated Simon’s reveal is, as he tears up, it’s difficult to tell if this is part of an act because it’s more convincing than the rest. Something about this must be true.
“Are you saying Ryan pushed him?” If he thinks I’m going to believe that bullshit—
“Well, don’t you have an imagination on you. No, nothing like that. We didn’t know what happened at first. Ryan claimed not to know either. The lying bastard. And Father was too busy making sure it wouldn’t become a scandal, fodder for the press. Father had to hide his dirty secrets, that Kieran was our half brother through an illicit affair. A few weeks later, Ryan, unable to bear the shame of his filthy secret, confessed to Father what happened that day. He told him what he and Kieran had done together, how he’d done it all to spite us for our betrayal. That the day after, he’d confronted Kieran in the woods, blamed him for the shameful thing they’d done. He wanted to make Kieran hate himself as much as Ryan hated him for what he’d done with me. And after making Kieran feel like a monster for succumbing to his desire, our brother, unable to bear the shame, threw himself from the drop-off.”
He practically spits that last sentence out, so full of rage over the injustice.
“I think in Ryan’s mind, it was just a game to make us pay. He didn’t know how his vengeance, his desire to punish me for my feelings would hurt Kieran. And his selfish actions caused Kieran to kill himself. Father saw through his crocodile tears, and that night, he contacted his attorney. Changed his will to grant me authority over the estate. Then he took his gun and shot himself in this office, right there.” He points to the desk chair, gazing at it longingly, as though he’s remembering his dear father.