Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 80689 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 403(@200wpm)___ 323(@250wpm)___ 269(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80689 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 403(@200wpm)___ 323(@250wpm)___ 269(@300wpm)
Although, Simon isn’t an idiot. He must’ve known Nell would bring up the subject at some point. He could have easily given her some extra money or even just a stern warning about the consequences if she mentioned anything to me. Given how he’s using me, it’s even possible he instructed her to bring it up. With a guy like Simon Hawthorne, I have to play out all possible scenarios, not jump to hasty conclusions.
When Ryan joins me for breakfast, I’m a little more cautious about rubbing my foot against his, now that I know Nell picks up on a lot more than she lets on. But even without the obvious physical nudges and caresses we sometimes sneak, surely she can’t miss the way I look at him, and the way he looks at me.
Maybe that’s why she’s so disturbed by Simon’s decision to add me to the roster.
After breakfast, I head back to my room and immediately start a Google search based on the information Nell offered up. Before, I knew if Simon checked my search history, he would suspect Ryan told me about Kieran. Now I have a perfectly justifiable reason for being curious that won’t tip Simon off about my allegiance, nor fuck up Charity’s chance at a future.
“William Randolph Hawthorne” + “Kieran”
“Hawthorne Heights” + “Kieran”
“Renovere, GA” + “Kieran”
“Hawthorne” + “Kieran” + “obituary”
“Hawthorne” + “rumors” + “affair”
“Hawthorne” + “nonmarital child”
The more intense my search becomes, the more I start to recognize I’m not just interested in learning about Kieran so I can fill in the gaps between the stories I heard, but because I want to know what was so special about him that he earned Ryan’s affection.
My search doesn’t produce any social media accounts.
No obituary.
No articles about his death.
Surely at some point during the late 2010s, Kieran must’ve left some online footprint? Although, with as much money as the Hawthornes have, they could easily hire a company to scrub clean certain sites. But the news sites that reported on his tragic death, those would still remain.
After a disappointing hour of searching in vain, I accept that Google isn’t where I’ll find my answers, and I’m left spinning in Nell’s comments.
The Hawthornes are a big family, probably with plenty of ancestors and history that they keep somewhere around here. I consider the various rooms I’ve encountered, where I might find photo albums, old documents, or news stories.
There’s Simon’s office…and the library…
Yes, the library could have stuff like that.
What am I thinking? Setting aside the fact that Simon might fire me if he catches me rifling through his home, I don’t need to go behind Ryan’s back looking for information on a guy who might have been his half brother.
No, if I’m going to try and get answers, I need to get them from him.
18
RYAN
There’s something in Jonas’s gaze this week—a question I can’t make out.
He gave me one of the we-need-to-talk signals, the one that means not immediately. Makes me think something’s happened. Maybe Simon’s had another conversation with him. Maybe he changed the rules of the game. I have to be ready for whatever this could be.
As far as our work goes, we’re finally finished with the rose beds around the pool. Now we’re shifting focus to the debris that’s accumulated, before moving back to day-to-day upkeep. Since their fight, Forsyth and Morgan have made up, a truce I’m sure they made after I impressed upon them the consequences. When Forsyth takes his lunch break, I send Morgan into town to grab supplies. Morgan’s task could have waited, but I need the excuse for Jonas and me to sneak off without rousing suspicion.
This time, I take him farther back than I usually do, to the creek, where it’s a little more scenic.
“Did Simon say something else?” I ask.
Is he onto us? Has he put another part of his plan into motion? Did he say something that indicates what he wants from this disturbing arrangement?
“No, nothing like that,” Jonas says before pursing his lips. His gaze shifts around.
And while I’m relieved to know I don’t have to navigate a new mindfuck from Simon, my worry lingers. There’s something else Jonas hasn’t pushed about, and I hope he hasn’t decided now’s his chance.
My anxiety intensifies, but I don’t rush him. I let him get to his news in his own time.
“Before I say this,” he begins, “I want to be clear that I believe you have a right to your privacy. I know there are some things you don’t want to talk about.”
Fuck. There it is. Because this thing haunts me. It stains me for life, and no matter how much I scrub at my flesh or try to push back the memories, it’ll never change the past…or my soul.
Jonas says, “I have to admit, I like spending time with you.”